tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-40001302819355575042024-03-19T01:03:06.938-04:00The Village Adroitis a little play-on-words and hopes to bring realism and reflection to the lives of its readers!Unknownnoreply@blogger.comBlogger139125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4000130281935557504.post-7892951401283821562013-10-01T23:28:00.000-04:002013-10-01T23:28:00.549-04:00Go Pink for Breast Cancer? Maybe It's Time We Rethink Pink.<br />
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October is “Breast Cancer Awareness Month” and I’m sure you won't be able to miss this information. "Pink Ribbon Blues" is meant to debunk the "Pink-tober" effect. <span style="font-family: inherit; font-style: inherit;">Practically every retailer gets into the pink ideal, as usual. In fact, last year, my husband’s employer printed up pink t-shirts and all employees were required to sit for a group photo that is displayed on their Facebook page. While the company (to our knowledge) hasn’t donated to any group or fund in an effort to eradicate breast cancer, their pink attire is meant to demonstrate their support, care and concern for breast cancer as an issue in our society. This is exactly the problem with the entire “pink” campaign as highlighted in Gayle Sulik’s book, </span><span style="border: 0px; font-family: inherit; font-size: 12px; font-style: inherit; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; text-transform: uppercase; vertical-align: baseline;"><a href="http://pinkribbonblues.org/the-book/" style="-webkit-transition: all 0.4s ease-in-out; border: 0px; color: #333333; font-family: inherit; font-style: inherit; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; text-decoration: none; transition: all 0.4s ease-in-out; vertical-align: baseline;">PINK RIBBON BLUES: HOW BREAST CANCER CULTURE UNDERMINES WOMEN’S HEALTH</a></span><span style="font-family: inherit; font-style: inherit;"> (Oxford University Press, 2001).</span></div>
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A woman who had breast cancer when she was in her mid-twenties stated that she avoided the media during October and tried to steer clear of retailers as much as possible because she wanted “to buy my English muffins and not be reminded of” her cancer. Imagine what this is like for women who have or know women who have breast cancer? Every time they do anything in the fall months, they’re reminded of the disease. What if every other kind of cancer suffered this media and sales blitz? With a month for each, stores would consist of a rainbow of competing interests! We’d ask ourselves, “Do I buy pink vanilla ice cream to support breast cancer or purchase yellow toilet tissue to show my allegiance to those who suffer from lymphoma?”</div>
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While we might want to support organizations that contribute to research, detection and treatment for breast cancer, we must also consider that corporations are making money off of breast cancer. When we buy the Yoplait with the “pink foil top” instead of the Chobani in October, we choose to support one corporation over another because of a cause with which the company aligns itself in an effort to influence us to buy their product. The pink that covers packaging and that is dyed or applied to every product is rather sickly upon closer inspection. Sulik asks after seeing a grocery store full of pink balloons and baked goods, “Is breast cancer really so festive?”</div>
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Not only is the pink campaign tiresome in every retail setting to people with or without breast cancer, it conveys a specific image and sets standards about the expectation of women with cancer. As Sulik points out, there are memoirs and articles about how women are supposed to “kick cancer’s butt wearing high heels.” This means that while we fight a potentially deadly disease, the treatment for which is its own kind of poison, we’re supposed to still uphold ideals of femininity and beauty. We don’t put on combat boots to fight cancer, we wear heels! Imagine if our doctors told us we’d feel better when we had the flu if we just got up and put on makeup in the morning, even as we tasted the lipstick when our attempt at breakfast failed or the mascara blackened our already sunken and feverish eyes.</div>
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As a society, we need to “think” about all kinds of cancer and the causes of cancer for sure, yet I believe we should leave the “pink” out of it.</div>
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A different version of this article was first published at HerCircleEzine.com 12/6/12: <a href="http://www.hercircleezine.com/2012/12/06/go-pink-for-breast-cancer-maybe-its-time-we-rethink-pink/">http://www.hercircleezine.com/2012/12/06/go-pink-for-breast-cancer-maybe-its-time-we-rethink-pink/</a></div>
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Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4000130281935557504.post-28509233441170523392013-08-22T10:36:00.001-04:002013-08-22T10:36:31.767-04:00Beyond the "Birds and the Bees" - What Adults Know (or don't know) About Reproductive Health<div class="MsoNormal">
I recently read an article about research into adults’
knowledge of reproductive health. The research itself focused on adults’
perceived level of knowledge and their actual ability to correctly answer
questions related to risks or health benefits of birth control methods,
abortion and pregnancy. The research also recorded demographic information to
learn more about whether one’s social position on abortion may be related to
one’s actual knowledge-base. For example, one of the questions asked participants
to determine whether first trimester abortion or childbirth was riskier to a
woman’s health. Only thirty percent (30%) chose the correct answer, which was
that childbirth is riskier than a first trimester abortion. That leaves the
majority of adults who believe childbirth and first trimester abortion are
equally risky or who believe that childbirth is safer. <o:p></o:p></div>
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A question related to use of birth control asked
participants to determine which percentage of women used some form of birth
control at some point in their lives, with the correct answer being ninety-nine
percent (99%). Only sixteen percent (16%) of respondents selected this as their
answer. More than half answered that just three-fourths of women use birth
control at some point. While the study does not specifically state what
constitutes birth control, participants’ responses can be seen as indicating
that many people are either not aware of women’s use of birth control and/or
have different views about what constitutes birth control. Birth control, in
the broadest sense, is anything done to prevent or otherwise deter pregnancy
from taking place. This would include the rhythm method and withdrawal, and
even the morning after pill, which is not an abortive and will not prevent
implantation (according to the latest research) or otherwise abort a fertilized
egg. For the record, the morning after pill has no effect on a fertilized egg.
It’s only benefit is to delay or stop ovulation. If ovulation has already occurred,
a woman has just as much chance of getting pregnant as she would if she did not
take the morning after pill. <o:p></o:p></div>
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Knowledge of the benefits of oral contraceptives is lacking.
Twenty-seven percent (27%) of respondents correctly answered that oral contraceptives
are believed to be protective against ovarian cancer. Twenty-eight percent
(28%) claimed this was not true and forty-seven percent (47%) were unsure as to
whether birth control pills conveyed any health benefits for ovarian cancer.
Not only has birth control pill research backed this up, but also other
research into the age of first menstruation, the age of menopause and the
number of pregnancies has all supported the idea that fewer cycles of ovulation
are protective against the risk of developing ovarian cancer. Considering the
survey results, I will be clear and state that the reason pregnancy conveys
protection is because ovulation is suppressed during gestation, and if a woman
breastfeeds, ovulation can be further delayed for sometimes up to a year after
childbirth. <o:p></o:p></div>
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The most disturbing part of the survey was that women who
had an abortion were more likely to answer incorrectly about the risks
associated with abortion where future pregnancy is concerned, and where the
actual risk of the procedure is concerned. The second most disturbing result
was that eighty-one (81%) of survey participants claimed they believed their
general knowledge base of reproductive health was high. The third most
disturbing result, yet not surprising either, is that respondents who want to
limit or eliminate abortion are more likely to answer the questions about birth
control and abortion incorrectly. This may indicate that their beliefs are
distorted by misinformation. Another surprising result was that men more often answered
correctly than women where questions around the risks of abortion and
childbirth were explored by the researchers. Of course, this may not
necessarily mean that men are actually more knowledgeable than women about the
risks of abortion and childbirth, but rather may indicate that men view anything
to do with women’s reproductive health as inherently risky. <o:p></o:p></div>
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The article I read was addressed to a professional audience
of physicians and other healthcare workers who interact with women around
reproductive health care as a call to never assume a level of knowledge or
understanding. The author instead advocated for providing information, even if
a patient indicated she already knew about birth control, oral contraceptives,
abortion, pregnancy and childbirth or whatever reproductive health issue being
discussed and/or treated. I’m writing this article to remind women and men to
be informed. Maybe you don’t have a need right now to run out and get the
latest issue of “Our Bodies, Ourselves,” or another text on women’s health.
However, before you make decisions about reproductive healthcare, make sure you
get reputable, scientifically supported information and education about all
options. Most of us have a health class in sixth-grade about puberty. We then
are fortunate if we get a class in high school that goes beyond abstinence-only
information. After that, while we might scan the internet for information, or
ask friends, we’re typically embarrassed to ask our physicians questions or to
verify information. Speak up! Visit reputable websites—not those with scare
tactics, and know your options. Your health depends on it.<o:p></o:p></div>
Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4000130281935557504.post-57380595237786921802013-06-26T11:38:00.001-04:002014-07-30T14:20:05.789-04:00A Reason to Celebrate Marriage<div style="text-align: right;">
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While there is plenty to argue over around the "institution" of marriage and its place in society in general as well as its connection to various kinds of privileges and benefits, those discussions will be tabled so that we may celebrate today's Supreme Court ruling that struck down D.O.M.A. (the Defense of Marriage Act) as unconstitutional. This is a victory for equal rights!<br />
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I still remember back in 1994 that fateful day in May here in Massachusetts when same-sex marriages began. The building I worked in at the time was directly across the street from City Hall in Worcester. I remember seeing couples exiting the building with well-wishers standing on the steps blowing bubbles, balloons floating in the light breeze and police presence further off to either side, making sure nothing stood in the way of joy and love as it exited the building that day. The weather was perfect: warm, sunny and dry. I offered to make a beverage run for the office because I wanted to be at street level even for just a bit of time. I stood on the street corner and called my husband via cell phone to describe the scene (no phones we could afford had streaming video capability then). We both cried tears of happiness for those couples able to join us as married people in Massachusetts. Today, we again celebrate this move toward equality for all couples! It is a move in the right direction, and strikes down a law that was absurd from its inception.<br />
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The law did not stop more progressive states from moving along and ignoring the federal law against same-sex benefits. Partner benefits were also loop holes around D.O.M.A. policy, which were already in place. The Bankruptcy Court recognized same-sex marriage for filings as of 2011. Now, the Supreme Court realizes that D.O.M.A. is unconstitutional and discriminatory and has fixed the problem across the board at the federal level. Of course, some states still resist. However, like other archaic marital laws throughout history, I believe each will come around given enough time--and commitment by equality-minded people! Like with any right or benefit, we cannot sit idly by thinking nothing can change or that once we've moved forward toward equality that we can't fall back again.<br />
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There is still work to be done where immigration policy and marriage is concerned, too. For some time now, same-sex international or immigrant couples could not marry legally in states recognizing same-sex marriage and have that status convey protection to deportation like opposite sex couples. Spouses could be separated and one spouse could be deported because of laws like D.O.M.A. that denied federal recognition of same-sex marriage. In some instances, when green cards or work visas were reviewed, individuals found themselves targeted because of their same-sex couple status, something that was "outed" when federal immigration staff found out the immigrant was married within the state in which he or she resided with his or her legal resident/citizen spouse.<br />
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We must be vigilant and dedicated to educating people everywhere that love doesn't discriminate, so neither should our social policy and laws as they apply to citizens, those seeking citizenship and immigrants.<br />
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For today, we put all of that aside and celebrate!Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4000130281935557504.post-43546149028858924762013-06-25T12:40:00.000-04:002014-07-30T14:22:27.647-04:00Perpetual Journal and Journal Keeping<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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For most of my life, I've wanted to keep a journal. I think I like the idea itself more than the practice. Even when there have been times that I've been faithful to journal-keeping, I tend to ramble on the blank pages and/or write things that I go back to read and find morose. For example, for years, when my husband worked days, six days a week, and I worked nights and weekends, including at least one overnight a week, we kept notebooks writing back and forth to one another. It was a tough time for both of us. The writing sustained us. I kept the journals as I thought we'd love to look back and read "how we made it through" and that it would be this romantic thing that we treasured. As each was finished, it was stored safely to avoid water damage. Fast forward a few years and we were planning a major move. I looked through everything we were keeping, deciding just what was crucial to keep and what was taking up space or should just be given away or tossed. I came across those notebooks and opened them thinking I'd be uplifted, or at the very least proud of what we were able to accomplish: raising our children, working hard, still remaining committed to one another, or any other variety of positive, wonderful things.<br />
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However, as I read the entries, it was like a time warp. Suddenly, I was transported via mental and emotional <a href="http://www.bbc.co.uk/programmes/b006q2x0/profiles/tardis" target="_blank">TARDIS</a> to that time. It was incredibly painful. It was like a PTSD-style flashback, and I do not mean that lightly or to sound funny. I mean it quite seriously. I was devastated by what I read. I was brought back to those feelings of loneliness, desperation, exhaustion and frustration. It hurt to read those pages. I immediately placed the notebook I had opened in the trash along with all the rest of the notebooks in the box without a further glance or thought. It was like finding a video or photographs or some other minute-by-minute replay of a life-altering and really negative event, like a car crash. I still don't regret doing it. I don't need any memory of those depressing, stressful times. Yes, the notebooks got us through. They may have even saved our marriage, and definitely saved our sanity. However, like an old bandage, there was nothing appealing about revisiting them.<br />
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<table cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="float: left; text-align: left;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgrKRQNn-3z84zSU2vHMIXla4-piADXoxU2AAl-O0Psd9WbDTAh5vvqpb-IhR5FTv0VVhs16Vm_iJWu0MnuqJxDlIOyheazLJACDTSZdviaZoCgxU2_tIYdK9HEeq89-1C9O-f76P8bvXs/s640/q%2526a.png" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgrKRQNn-3z84zSU2vHMIXla4-piADXoxU2AAl-O0Psd9WbDTAh5vvqpb-IhR5FTv0VVhs16Vm_iJWu0MnuqJxDlIOyheazLJACDTSZdviaZoCgxU2_tIYdK9HEeq89-1C9O-f76P8bvXs/s320/q%2526a.png" height="134" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><span style="background-color: white;"><span style="color: #674ea7;"><a href="http://www.barnesandnoble.com/p/home-gift-q-a-a-day-5-year-journal/22817787" target="_blank">Q&A A Day Journal</a></span></span></td></tr>
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<a href="http://ecx.images-amazon.com/images/I/41ro+3kBT1L._SL500_AA300_.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"></a>While not as powerfully repelling as those notebooks, I have found journals to be somewhat mundane or otherwise less-than-thrilling to look back upon over time. Since I belong to the New England ATC+ Meetup Group, I make hand-bound journals and art books/journals all the time. I have also actually been keeping a five-year "couple lines a day" journal for over a year. What I LOVE about the Q&A a day journal is not only the limitations of space for each day, but also the fact that each year, I get to see what was going on the year before. This is the best part of the perpetual journal and I plan to keep one for the rest of my life, in some fashion or another. I have the Q&A style now, and I have a <span style="color: blue;">"<a href="http://www.amazon.com/The-Happiness-Project-One-Sentence-Journal/dp/B008GB1XKG" target="_blank">Happiness Project" 5-year-journal</a></span> once this one is finished.<br />
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Because I've made so many art journals, I went searching for ways to inspire using them. They look amazing just as they are. However, all those <a href="http://www.clothpaperscissors.com/" target="_blank">Cloth, Paper, Scissors</a> eye-candy magazines feature publications specific to art journals. Some of their other publications have articles and features about art journals, as well. I also took a <span style="color: magenta;"><a href="http://www.strathmoreartist.com/blog-month/tag/Workshops.html" target="_blank">Strathmore</a></span> brand art journal course online, complete with materials lists and videos on using and altering your art journal. I love the work I see done by other artists! I cannot seem to somehow get that curly lettering style down, or even a more utilitarian block print. Besides, what do I say? Even if I write about something inspiring, or that was newsworthy or otherwise journal-worthy, I find that once I finish the journal, I don't necessarily want to keep it. (This is related to my purge-cycle self who refuses to store things for the sake of them. A pack rat, I am not!) I end up unceremoniously tossing the journal into the garbage or recycling it in the bin. Sometimes, if we're having a fire, I might toss it in as kindling. That's as reverent as I get about it. Sure, they're pretty to look at. However, will I ever go back and re-read them? It's not likely. It's not exciting to do so. This brings me full-circle to the compact tidiness of the "line a day" style multiple year/perpetual journal.<br />
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Imagine my delight then when I searched for "art journal" and found a home-made version of the line-a-day, perpetual journal/calendar! I just had to make one! I spoke with a friend<span style="background-color: white;"><span style="color: #8e7cc3;">,<a href="https://melissacorlissdelorenzo.wordpress.com/" target="_blank"> <b>Melissa Delorenzo</b></a> </span></span>(check out her blog!) and asked if she had heard of this kind of thing before. Her sister, also a friend, has one that a friend made her. Since Melissa doesn't have one, and I was dying to make one, Melissa is the lucky recipient of the project pictured here. If you Google "<a href="https://www.google.com/search?q=perpetual+calendar&rlz=1C1TSNO_enUS506US506&source=lnms&tbm=isch&sa=X&ei=zxTLUczUB6Li0gH2pYDwDQ&ved=0CAkQ_AUoAQ&biw=1366&bih=624#rlz=1C1TSNO_enUS506US506&tbm=isch&sa=1&q=perpetual+journal&oq=perpetual+journal&gs_l=img.3..0i24l3.1904.4691.0.4921.15.15.0.0.0.0.134.977.14j1.15.0.crnk_timediscountb..0.0.0..1.1.17.img.NHA5h1nTYvk&bav=on.2,or.r_qf.&bvm=bv.48340889,d.dmQ&fp=21b789021d0a9517&biw=1366&bih=624" target="_blank">perpetual journal</a>" under Google images, you will find a lot of variations on the project. Most credit Design Sponge with the idea and format, and so here is a link to Kate Pruitt's page that depicts the her version of the project: <a href="http://www.designsponge.com/2010/12/diy-project-vintage-postcard-calendar-journal.html">http://www.designsponge.com/2010/12/diy-project-vintage-postcard-calendar-journal.html</a>.<br />
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My next may involve purchasing library book check-out cards and using those since they have a line already for the date and then a space already for a phrase that sums up the day or some aspect of it. We'll have to see though since I already bought hundreds of index cards and have a date to make more of these with another friend mid-July. I also saw websites with ideas about decorating the card for your birthday and/or marking other birthdays, anniversaries and/or significant dates and holidays in your life. (Wait 'til Melissa sees the tiny top border of gold stars I put on her birthday!) Since my version is slightly different from the Design Sponge idea, here is a suggested list of supplies/ideas to inspire your own:<br />
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THE CARDS:<br />
*Use whatever size cards or card stock you want. I used 4x6 index cards and cut them in half. You will need enough to make 366 cards (because, yes, Leap Year is important to some of us).<br />
*If you like your handwriting (I've already judged my own above) then hand-date each set of cards. Otherwise, you will need a stamp pad and date stamp. You do not use the year part of the stamp, so you will either have to cover it or if you buy one with years on it already, just use a razor blade like I did to scrape off one of the years so you have a "blank" that won't print.<br />
*I found it easiest to do a month at a time, adjusting just the numbers as I went along. Since some months have 30 days and some have 31...and one has 28 or 29, depending on the year, it's easier to stamp by month to remember which is what. The old saying helps: 30 days has September, April, June and November. All the rest have 31...except February.<br />
*I also let some of the less-than-perfect stamps that were lighter in areas or a bit smudged just be part of the charm and only re-stamped those that were really a mess or I did too close to the edge so the date was cut off.<br />
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THE DIVIDERS:<br />
*I used card stock of several types. Some is decorated on both sides, some was plain and some patterned/printed.<br />
*I cut these to be 3" wide, since cutting a 4x6 index card in 1/2 the short way makes 4x3 sized cards. The card stock was then cut to a size of 4.25" so that a little edge became the decorative divider.<br />
*For some of the plainer card stock, I used rubber stamps to give them a little "more" decorative presence and also some washi tape (essentially this is decorated masking tape, something of which I am deeply enamored).<br />
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THE CONTAINER:<br />
There are lots of ways of finding and/or creating a container for the cards. The way to accommodate 12 card stock dividers and 366 index cards is to make sure that the container's depth (front to back) measurement is at least 3.25". I cut the one shown in cardboard in the picture at the top of this blog entry using a template from a container for cube notes and so the dimensions are definitely not "accurate" yet are close enough to being about that size.<br />
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<a href="http://ecx.images-amazon.com/images/I/41ro+3kBT1L._SL500_AA300_.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><br /></a>Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4000130281935557504.post-50527961123066916252013-03-21T23:26:00.000-04:002013-06-27T08:19:25.285-04:00Is Man the Ultimate Woman?<br />
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<header class="entry-header" style="color: #333333; font-family: Quicksand, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 16px; line-height: 24px;"><span style="color: #333333; font-family: inherit; font-size: 16px; font-style: inherit; line-height: 24px;">For years, I believed that most fashion designers of women’s clothing actually meant to dress men. The ultra-thin runway models, almost devoid of breasts, with their above-average height for women resemble men.</span></header><br />
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Now there is proof to support my theory.</div>
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The Associated Press reported that transgender (male to female) individuals are being used as models in Brazil. While I wholeheartedly embrace the idea of transgender people in the limelight receiving positive attention versus ridicule or harassment, I find it difficult to accept this from the fashion industry. As if it weren’t already nearly impossible for the majority of women to meet the runway model ideal, that standard is now becoming entirely impossible due to the fact that most women were not born more bio-chemically male than female.</div>
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I find it difficult to protest the “use” (and I choose that word purposefully) of trans-models because I understand gender identity itself as more fluid than fixed, and have sincere empathy for any person who feels entirely in the wrong body, like some kind of “Freaky Friday” accident. I am wholly comfortable in my female body, and cannot imagine how foreign it would feel for my brain to be transplanted into a male body. I imagine this as the situation transgender people face. Not only do transgender persons feel out of place in their own bodies, but there is also a long history in many cultures of discrimination against anyone who is transgendered. That we may have advanced to the point where transgender individuals find a place where their status as transgendered is not merely accepted but rather embraced should be celebrated! That said, I claim the fashion industry is using transgender individuals.</div>
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The fashion and modeling industries sometimes seem like Halloween all year long. The majority of the population cannot afford what is shown in the pages of <span style="border: 0px; font-family: inherit; font-size: 12px; font-style: inherit; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; text-transform: uppercase; vertical-align: baseline;">VOGUE</span>, for example. For that matter, many of the designs are impractical for everyday wear. Additionally, the styles may look fabulous on a 5’10” 110 pound seventeen year-old female, yet fail to enthrall when a 110 pound 5’5” tall woman dons them. (For some perspective on the heights and weights listed, normal weight with a BMI between 18.5 and 25 for a woman 5’10” is 132 to 174 pounds. For a 5’5” tall woman, a weight between 114-150 pounds puts her BMI at 18.5 to 25. Thus, a 5’5” woman weighing 110 pounds is actually below the normal BMI range. The average model height for runway fashion is 5’10” with an average weight of 110 pounds.)</div>
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Thus, while I’m glad that some transgender individuals have found work rather than face discrimination in the workplace, I do not believe they are being truly accepted, but rather used for their bodies. The use of bodies that are predominantly male in their genetic, biological and chemical make-up creates a woman’s body that is scientifically impossible for people born genetically, biologically and chemically female to emulate. Feminists have long-criticized the fashion industry for its objectification of women. We are now subjected to the male body turned female, an ideal no woman who was not once male can achieve.</div>
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Most men do not have the bodies of supermodels, and in a perverse way, the fashion industry has created gender equality by objectifying the male body in the same way they’ve done to women’s bodies. The disembodied “abs” of men grace shopping bags, store décor and billboards, for example. Body dysmorphic disorder is gender neutral, and boys represent the growing number of people who suffer from anorexia. My own fifteen year old son, whose body is not quite through growing and developing, fears that women will reject him if he doesn’t start looking like Captain America soon.</div>
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I hope this latest move by the fashion industry opens the minds and hearts of people so that transgender individuals find an accepting and understanding world ready to support them. I cannot help but also lament the impossible ideal male-to-female transgender models put forth for women and especially girls as models of women’s clothing. I still hold onto my fashion fantasy: real women, of all heights and weights wearing practical and flattering designs!</div>
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First published: <a href="http://www.hercircleezine.com/2013/03/21/is-man-the-ultimate-woman-2/">http://www.hercircleezine.com/2013/03/21/is-man-the-ultimate-woman-2/</a></div>
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Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4000130281935557504.post-8558391307415567622013-01-31T20:28:00.000-05:002013-06-27T08:19:11.180-04:00Mental Health Care: A Topic on Which a Liberal Feminist and Republican Representatives Agree?<br />
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Mental Health Care: A Topic on Which a Liberal Feminist and Republican Representatives Agree?</h1>
<span class="post-date" style="border: 0px; display: block; font-family: inherit; font-style: inherit; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;"><time class="entry-date" datetime="2013-01-31T00:00:33+00:00" pubdate="" style="-webkit-transition: all 0.4s ease-in-out; border: 0px; color: #333333; font-family: inherit; font-style: inherit; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; text-decoration: none; transition: all 0.4s ease-in-out; vertical-align: baseline;">Published at www.hercircleezine.com - <a href="http://www.hercircleezine.com/2013/01/31/mental-health-care-a-topic-on-which-a-liberal-feminist-and-republican-representatives-agree/" rel="bookmark" style="-webkit-transition: all 0.4s ease-in-out; border: 0px; color: #333333; font-family: inherit; font-style: inherit; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; text-decoration: none; transition: all 0.4s ease-in-out; vertical-align: baseline;" title="12:00 am">January 31, 2013</a></time></span><span class="post-date" style="border: 0px; display: block; font-family: inherit; font-style: inherit; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;"><a href="http://www.hercircleezine.com/2013/01/31/mental-health-care-a-topic-on-which-a-liberal-feminist-and-republican-representatives-agree/">http://www.hercircleezine.com/2013/01/31/mental-health-care-a-topic-on-which-a-liberal-feminist-and-republican-representatives-agree/</a></span></header><br />
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In the aftermath of the school shooting this past December in Newtown, Connecticut, where elementary school children and teachers lost their lives as the result of a troubled gunman, the debate about gun control has moved to the front burner. An issue that has long simmered in the U.S., it seems that gun control is finally getting close attention. From bans on particular weapons and limits on ammunition clips, to more consistent, comprehensive background checks for gun permits and purchases, many so-called solutions have been lobbed forth from bunkers where the various camps on this issue take cover.</div>
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The old “guns don’t kill people, people kill people” statement has been dusted off by those favoring gun rights. Silly analogies, such as claims that “baseball bats are used to kill people, so why don’t we ban all baseball bats?” have been put forth to deflect charges made against weapons. Hunting has been “ok’d,” while the possession of assault rifles and quantities of bullets in magazines for assault weapons has been attacked. When the press called the National Rifle Association (N.R.A.), the organization deflected criticism by pointing the finger at policing. Essentially, the N.R.A. said, “Don’t look at us law-abiding gun owners—it’s the illegal firearms, the lack of policing, the problems in the justice system.” Then, as an added offensive defense, the N.R.A. said, “Oh, and what about violent video games?” as if to suggest it’s not owning and shooting actual firearms that contributes to violence with guns, but rather its the result of virtual, digital shooting of firearms.</div>
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The video game industry has been arrested, tried and convicted by the mere indictment. When it was invited to the table to talk with Vice President Biden’s task force to address gun violence in our country, the video game industry was damned. If the industry participated in talks, it was admitting a role in societal violence, hence condemning itself by its mere presence. If it ignored the invitation, then it was charged (and convicted) with not being responsible for its products. Gaming magazines and online forums held their own talks and published articles this past month on the issue, making this point.</div>
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Gamers and developers repeatedly complain about the fact that the most violent games—shooting games especially—are always rated “M” for “Mature,” which amounts to games created for the seventeen-plus person. That children are playing violent shooting games is the problem of parenting, not the industry. My favorite comparison is film. Parents see the “R” rating, and automatically disallow their children viewing of films with this rating. They do not buy these films for children under seventeen, and if they allow kids to watch “R” rated films, the majority of parents watch the films with their children. When it comes to video games, the word “game” apparently somehow erases the “M” rating from parents’ minds.</div>
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When my husband purchases video games for himself and our son, the clerk in the store regularly asks whether my husband is aware of the rating of the particular game, and warns him that the game play is not necessarily suitable for our son. This tells us that more often than not, store clerks are warning parents away from certain games at the point of purchase, potentially losing sales for the company, which is practically unheard of in any retail industry. My husband has witnessed an annoyed parent march into a store to buy an “M” rated game for an adolescent, who was refused at the register unless a parent accompanied him or her in the purchase of the game. The parent inevitably blows off the warnings of the clerk, sighs exasperatedly, and theatrically (and rudely) jams cash or a credit card at the clerk, then storms out of the store with his or her child and the game in tow.</div>
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My son has been playing “M” rated games for years. He has also been watching “R” rated movies for a long time. My husband and I screen films (and games) and my husband also plays these games with our son. They discuss what is going on in the game, and the value (or lack thereof) of the content. Is there something from history in the game? What portion or side of a story is being told in the game? What side of the story is missing? What does online play with strangers say about human nature? (This last question is always a good one for a long conversation!) All of these questions (and more) are addressed regularly. Games with story lines are discussed. How men and women are depicted, and even the interaction between human and alien populations is part of the discourse around games, their content, online play and design of the game itself, its merits where game play, storytelling and art intersect. Video games make for a rich discussion in our household. These discussions lead to talks about conflict resolution, the actual violence in today’s world and violence throughout human history. If more parents heeded the warnings of the game labels, knew the content of what they let their children play and used games as a gateway to conversation, video games would not be blamed.</div>
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The attack on video games reminds me of the outrage around heavy metal in the 1980s, when teen suicide was blamed on particular bands and their music. Parents, grieving the loss of a child, placed the blame on heavy metal bands and the song lyrics that their suicidal teens listened to. The lyrics often spoke of despair, suicide or violence. Thus, the bands were to blame. No one wanted to consider that the teen was drawn to such music because of already present depression. No one wanted to think that a child isolated in his or her room listening to hours and hours of music without human contact was the problem—–whether the music was heavy metal or classical. No one wanted to recognize that a lack of public awareness about and the stigma attached to mental illness and depression contributed to the problem.</div>
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Now that I’ve mentioned mental illness and depression, I get to the crux of what I’d like to now call my open letter to President Obama, Democrats across the country, and Republicans in positions where they might act in Congress today. Republican representatives in Ohio spoke out against gun control the third week of January this year. In place of gun control, they claimed President Obama was not doing something about the real issue: mental health. I propose that the President invite every member of Congress to a meeting in which he asks whether both Republicans and Democrats might agree to put aside any talks about gun control whatsoever in favor of a discussion about mental health. Let’s not consider changing one thing at the federal level, nor at the state level. Let’s not ask for universal background checks. Let’s not discuss what number of bullets is not dangerous in a single clip of ammunition (such a silly argument anyway since a single bullet is, obviously, meant to be deadly). Let’s not talk about assault weapons. Let’s agree that guns don’t kill people, and that people kill people. Let’s talk about what “kind” of people kill people with guns, in fact. Republicans and members of the N.R.A. would have to admit that unstable, emotionally vulnerable, mentally ill people are those who are most likely to use any kind of weapon, regardless of the amount of ammunition, to kill people, including classrooms full of children. We can all likely agree that mentally stable people do not walk into malls or kindergartens or former employers and kill people.</div>
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Now that all of that has been made clear, that talks in Congress will not be about gun control, but rather about mental health care, and not just mental health care but rather specifically mental health treatment and access to this treatment, and let me run-on this sentence further to say that talks will also be about removing the stigma associated with mental health treatment, let’s talk about it. Of course, I am sure that plenty of people will know where I am going with this as a liberal feminist. You might have heard the words “health care” uttered together as I began this paragraph. If you were a Republican, or member of the N.R.A. (or both), and President Obama started down this line of talk, you might wonder where the other shoe was and when it was going to drop. Well, here it is. I’d like nothing more than to have talks in Congress be about health care, access to health care and removing stigma from mental health treatment. Yet, when we talked about this last time, when a couple dozen (white, suburban) elementary school children had not been killed so recently, Republicans weren’t so keen on mental health care, unless it was something each individual paid for through a private company with no cap on earnings for its executives, no caps on bonuses, and definitely no caps on premiums for coverage for each individual. A single-payer plan, which would allow access to physical health as well as mental health care, was at the very least considered socialism and quite possibly was akin to communism. However, I do not believe we can have a conversation about, or blame our President for a lack thereof, mental health care or the stigma associated with mental health treatment without considering health care and how it is provided in our country.</div>
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Thus, a liberal feminist and Republican congressional representatives agree about mental health care. We agree that Americans need access to mental health care, and that stigma must be removed from seeking such care. We also agree that access to mental health care will do more to reduce violence of all kinds, including gun violence than any gun control measures. Where I know we will battle is about how we can assure access. However, seeing as Republican representatives made the suggestion, I now wait to see exactly what they’ll do about this call to action on mental health as a national issue.</div>
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Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4000130281935557504.post-64068362381285886672012-12-20T20:33:00.000-05:002013-06-27T08:18:59.579-04:00"Presents" of Mind<div style="background-color: white; border: 0px; color: #333333; font-family: Quicksand, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 16px; line-height: 24px; margin-bottom: 1.5em; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;">
<i>First published at <a href="http://www.hercircleezine.com/2012/12/20/presents-of-mind/" style="background-color: transparent;">http://www.hercircleezine.com/2012/12/20/presents-of-mind/</a> December 20, 2012.</i></div>
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Each year, I cannot help but be disturbed by the holiday season and the demands for donations of gifts from all over. It’s as if “not getting something” was akin to having a fatal disease with the fervor expressed by the campaigns for gift donations. From toy drives to “adopt a family” programs, we seem to collectively view not having presents as sacrilege. Why this time of the year? What about birthdays or other milestones? What about doing something radical about poverty, hunger and need in our country to eradicate them entirely?</div>
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I have complex feelings about how we perpetuate a consumerist culture and society through the importance placed on gifts. I am also perplexed at having children from poverty-stricken families ask for video games—that are typically $60 each—when that clearly means the family not only has the $300+ gaming system, but also obviously a television and electricity. The ages of the children involved, and including parents is equally perplexing to me. I can see if someone would be without a winter jacket, yet cannot see the possible “benefit” of frivolous things like more-expensive-than-regular-soap bath products that seem to be popular requests.</div>
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It’s not that I believe people should “go without” or that we cannot feel “poor” by the standards of our specific community. For a good portion of my children’s lives, we rented a home in an affluent town in Massachusetts. An example of what I mean about feeling poor by community standards is this: one holiday season, my husband and I had saved enough money to purchase iPods for our children rather than having them share the Shuffle we won at a holiday party several years before. We got them a few other small gifts like books and some candy for their stockings. The iPods were their “big” gift and something they were definitely not expecting given our financial situation. They were both thrilled with their iPod Touches, which were the lower memory versions as they cost less. When my daughter went to school after the holidays, she found that most of her classmates and friends received iPod Touches as stocking stuffers and the first generation of iPad or a laptop or another extravagant gift as their “big” gifts. So, by community standards, our children were definitely “lacking.” At the same time, we by no means felt our lives were lacking.</div>
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I realize that living in a particular community one may feel less privileged or underprivileged by comparison. At the same time, I believe we must always keep this in perspective, and be aware of what true poverty means and how fortunate we are by worldwide standards of living. This year, with me enrolled in full time graduate school, thus working fewer hours at my three part-time jobs, and with one child in college, expenses have increased while income has decreased. We face a very limited budget this year for the holidays. In fact, we rely on the hope that my husband will receive a holiday bonus, and this is what will be used to purchase anything we decide we will do for the holidays. I know what our income level is in relation to the poverty level. We would likely “qualify” to participate in these gift programs ourselves this year. Yet, instead of asking for luxury items from others, we discussed with our children the riches we feel we do have: health, education, heat, housing, food and one another. We talked about not contributing to the debt cycle like those who charge gifts only to be burdened by bills long after the shine has worn off something new. We talked about how not opening a gift in December is not the end of the world, regardless of the Mayan calendar! (So, there was another thing we have that money cannot buy: a sense of humor and shared laughter.)</div>
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We also talked about other cultures and religions and how the gift drives, toy drives and adopt-a-family-once-a-year programs all negate anything outside of Christianity. There are no programs for Jewish families who may be struggling to provide eight nights of gifts. And, what of faiths and cultures in our country and our towns and cities that do not have a holiday in December? This, of course, brings us full circle to the needs of families and individuals the whole year round.</div>
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How is this rant part of feminist critique? Well, if feminism is really about equality for all, then we cannot look past and not consider the larger context for holiday gifting programs and how they promote consumerism or how they exclude everyone who is not of the Christian religion. We cannot, on a daily basis, look past the overstuffed vehicle in a parking lot that clearly houses at least one person, or the often invisible needs of families for food and heat. We must sustain presence of mind about issues of inequality and oppression in all arenas and refrain from making ourselves feel good about giving presents once a year.</div>
Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4000130281935557504.post-8000049319349239752012-12-13T20:35:00.000-05:002013-06-27T08:18:47.739-04:00"Cemetery Girl" Book Review and Reflection<br />
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“Cemetery Girl”</h1>
<span class="post-date" style="border: 0px; display: block; font-family: inherit; font-style: inherit; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;"><time class="entry-date" datetime="2012-12-13T00:00:19+00:00" pubdate="" style="-webkit-transition: all 0.4s ease-in-out; border: 0px; color: #333333; font-family: inherit; font-style: inherit; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; text-decoration: none; transition: all 0.4s ease-in-out; vertical-align: baseline;">First published <a href="http://www.hercircleezine.com/2012/12/13/cemetary-girl/" rel="bookmark" style="-webkit-transition: all 0.4s ease-in-out; border: 0px; color: #333333; font-family: inherit; font-style: inherit; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; text-decoration: none; transition: all 0.4s ease-in-out; vertical-align: baseline;" title="12:00 am">December 13, 2012</a></time><span class="byline" style="border: 0px; display: inline; font-family: inherit; font-style: inherit; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;"> at </span><a href="http://www.hercircleezine.com/2012/12/13/cemetary-girl/">http://www.hercircleezine.com/2012/12/13/cemetary-girl/</a></span></header><br />
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<a href="http://www.hercircleezine.com/2012/12/13/cemetary-girl/121213_cemetary_girl/" rel="attachment wp-att-22786" style="-webkit-transition: all 0.4s ease-in-out; border: 0px; color: #333333; font-family: inherit; font-style: inherit; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; text-decoration: none; transition: all 0.4s ease-in-out; vertical-align: baseline;"><img alt="" class="alignleft size-medium wp-image-22786" height="300" src="http://www.hercircleezine.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/12/121213_Cemetary_Girl-198x300.jpg" style="border: 0px; display: inline; float: left; height: auto; margin-bottom: 1.5em; margin-right: 1.5em; margin-top: 1.5em; max-width: 100%;" title="121213_Cemetery_Girl" width="198" /></a><span style="border: 0px; font-family: inherit; font-size: 12px; font-style: inherit; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; text-transform: uppercase; vertical-align: baseline;">CEMETERY GIRL</span> by David Bell is about a twelve-year-old girl who goes missing and is returned to her family four years later, at sixteen. The story is told from the point of view of her father. His history is complicated, and has an impact on how he deals with his daughter’s disappearance, and her return. So as to not ruin the plot or suspense, I’ll suffice to say that our worst nightmare may not be the kidnapping of our child, but rather what we learn upon his or her return. While every parent of a kidnapped child wants nothing more than the return of that child, the fact remains that the experience renders every family member changed.</div>
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What stays with me as the result of reading this book are the questions that we ask ourselves as parents, as well as the questions we would like to avoid. We all consider when we might allow our children to walk to the park alone, or walk home from school or to a friend’s house. We check with friends, consider our own childhood experiences, and think about the safety of our current block, neighborhood, city or town. We track milestones, possibly mark a wall in a closet or the casing of a bedroom door with physical growth. We keep report cards to measure our children’s academic success and progress. We may cherish and simultaneously regret the first day of kindergarten, graduation from elementary school, the first day of high school and high school graduation. We worry and celebrate the first date, the first time they take the car out alone after getting a license, and freshman year of college.</div>
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Some of us talk about sex. We have the “birds and bees” talk, or leave a book on puberty on the night stand in our child’s room. A few of us address burgeoning sexuality, and attempt to normalize the feelings our children may have. How often do we talk about sexual development outside of the girls-develop-breasts-and-get-their-periods and boys-grow-hair-and-get-deeper-voices-and-may-experience-nocturnal-emissions? Yes, it is that awkward and silly, isn’t it? It is extremely challenging for parents to consider the sexual identity of their children. Especially in the United States at this point in our culture and society, our children are no longer children once we consider sex. Or, they remain children and are patronized, even when their burgeoning sexuality becomes obvious. There are the pregnancies and bladder infections that are also discovered to include chlamydia. Even then, most parents don’t address the sexuality of their children. It’s like the pregnancy is the thing we deal with, and we ignore the “how” of it. It’s that we address the antibiotics, and maybe even talk about the importance of condoms, without ever really talking about sex itself. We only talk about sex with our kids as part of reproduction, or when we’re warning them away from it.</div>
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What <span style="border: 0px; font-family: inherit; font-size: 12px; font-style: inherit; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; text-transform: uppercase; vertical-align: baseline;">CEMETERY GIRL</span> reminded me of is the fact that there are a lot of unhealthy views of sex and we pass these along to our children. It perpetuates generation after generation. We don’t want to consider that our eleven-year-old children, male or female, may be exploring their bodies, and discovering the pleasures that can be found within them. That’s “too early” for such talks in the minds of most parents. Or, we’re in denial. We say, “Well, other kids may be like that, but my daughter/son is so innocent!” In some instances, that is true. When my daughter took a class sponsored by the local Unitarian Universalist Church entitled “Our Whole Lives,” or “O.W.L.,” there was a girl from her class at school who cried every time the class was held. She was the same age as my daughter, yet was definitely not ready for the information presented.</div>
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The point of this article is to encourage us all to know our children. What I mean by that is actually “get to know” our children, rather than assuming that we do. We have to let our children know us, too. No, we don’t have to share details of our sexual lives. Rather, we need to be open, really open, to talking with our children, to figuring out the difference between kids who say, “Oh, no, not more sex talk,” and otherwise handle the information well when we have the talk after talk after talk, and the kids who really aren’t ready for the conversation—truly, and that it’s not us who isn’t ready. We have to make ourselves ready for conversation, too. We have to be honest with our kids. When a friend said she was envious of my ability to talk openly with my own children about sex and sexuality, I told her it was perfectly okay that she wasn’t comfortable, actually. All she had to do was be honest about this with her kids. She didn’t know how to react when her daughter asked questions that she was not sure how to answer. I told her it was okay to let her daughter know that she had no idea how to respond. And, it is. It’s okay to tell our kids that we’re not sure how to answer their questions, or that we may not have the answers, but also that we’ll get them. It’s okay to let our kids know that we want to talk with them, but that while we want a relationship that is more open than that which we had with our own parents, we, too, sometimes may be embarrassed or unsure as to how to talk about topics we find difficult. We must promise them that we’ll work on our own issues with open sex talk as we work on the topics they bring to us. And, we have to uphold that promise.</div>
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For a suspenseful read, that will leave you thinking long and hard about what you know about your children, what you may or may not want to know, and how important it might be to have the hard talks, check out <span style="border: 0px; font-family: inherit; font-size: 12px; font-style: inherit; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; text-transform: uppercase; vertical-align: baseline;">CEMETERY GIRL</span>. It’s left me thinking about what I even consider “my worst nightmare” and how having our dearest wish fulfilled can sometimes leave us with more questions, with unanswerable questions, and questions that we don’t really want to have answered possibly. <span style="border: 0px; font-family: inherit; font-size: 12px; font-style: inherit; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; text-transform: uppercase; vertical-align: baseline;">CEMETERY GIRL</span> is suspenseful and compellingly told, from an interesting viewpoint with a very different outcome than the typical thriller in this genre. It will also leave you thinking about your own children, or nieces and nephews, and asking important questions.</div>
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Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4000130281935557504.post-16723679097069708062012-12-04T20:38:00.000-05:002013-06-27T08:18:33.024-04:00Are We Brave Enough?<div style="background-color: white; border: 0px; color: #333333; font-family: Quicksand, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 16px; line-height: 24px; margin-bottom: 1.5em; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;">
First published Dec. 4, 2012 at <a href="http://www.hercircleezine.com/2012/12/04/are-we-brave-enough/" style="background-color: transparent;">http://www.hercircleezine.com/2012/12/04/are-we-brave-enough/</a></div>
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The allure of princesses for little girls cannot be denied. And neither can the ambivalence or straight-out abhorrence some mothers feel towards those same princesses. The focus on some prescribed external beauty and a delicate femininity is difficult for many women to swallow as their little girls prance past in frilly gowns, plastic high-heeled shoes and glittery accoutrement. Some assert the princess-ing of our daughters is not harmful in the least while others believe thinking it harmless is dangerous to those little girls’ developing ideas of what it means to be a woman today. And maybe the clothes and accessories in and of themselves are not particularly harmful. Perhaps the dress-up is a simple exploration in normal childhood imaginative play and role-playing. It can be argued, however, that the danger arrives with the contextualization of the ideas of princess through literature and especially the Disney depiction of princesses in their movies. The Disney Princesses have become pervasive in our culture—from the repetitive watching of the movies and spin-off television shows to all the accompanying merchandise, the Princesses have been difficult to avoid for watchful mothers for the past generation.</div>
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The Princesses have not done much to assert themselves as strong female role models. Their passive roles in their own stories, their need to be rescued by the Prince, their primary self-actualization ascertained through attaining that same Prince in marriage. In many of the stories, the Princesses neither fight nor work for what they glean in the end. They represent stereotypical gender roles, stereotypical ideals of femininity, a singular kind of girliness which polarizes gender in a world that ultimately encourages women to seek equal ground with our male counterparts in our personal and professional relationships with them. Additionally, the gender polarization effectually marginalizes any child (regardless of gender) who does not fit the mold.</div>
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<span style="border: 0px; font-family: inherit; font-size: 12px; font-style: inherit; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; text-transform: uppercase; vertical-align: baseline;"><a href="http://disney.go.com/brave/index.html" style="-webkit-transition: all 0.4s ease-in-out; border: 0px; color: #333333; font-family: inherit; font-style: inherit; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; text-decoration: none; transition: all 0.4s ease-in-out; vertical-align: baseline;">BRAVE</a></span>, the latest Disney/Pixar release, might be a film in which the contemporary paradigm of princess is challenged. While <span style="border: 0px; font-family: inherit; font-size: 12px; font-style: inherit; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; text-transform: uppercase; vertical-align: baseline;">BRAVE</span>, does begin with a terrifying scenes of a bear attack and then follows the Disney tradition of establishing a horrible mother figure, the film does contain redeeming qualities. Near the beginning of the film, Merida, the princess, is shown riding off on her horse for a day wherein “she can change her fate.” Merida is entering her teen years, when she is to be betrothed. She does not wish to have marriage foisted upon her, and she also wants to make her own way in the world.</div>
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In some respects, the old “women-are-the-weaker, yet-more-intelligent” sex stereotypes are at play. At the same time, Elinor, the queen, is not portrayed as overly voluptuous, and when she makes order of the brawling clans in the throne room, she does so with her commanding presence. Both her strength of character and her demand for respect come through. Late in the film, Elinor in a guise as a bear, attempts to sneak through the throne room to her chambers where she and Merida will “mend the bond that pride has broken.” This will be achieved by Merida sewing back together the tapestry she destroyed in a fit of rage at her mother and Merida herself commands the presence of the men in the room. Again, here, there is a reverence for Merida’s presence, and there is not a hint or whiff of the male gaze as being commanded by her female form. For these instances of women commanding attention, and not with their corporeal forms, but rather from a position of respect, the film deserves kudos.</div>
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In the end, Merida says, “Our fate lies within us. You only need to be brave enough to see it.” She might seem to be talking to herself, and to other young women who might break with whatever traditions that do not serve them. However, mothers might be remiss if they do not also hear Merida’s reminder. Our fate does lie within us, and our daughters’ fates lie within them. We must be brave to raise our daughters and to support our sisters and friends to find their own ways within themselves. We must also not allow our own worries and fears to cloud the vision of our daughters’ fates when they bravely attempt to reveal them to us.</div>
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At the same time, our daughters might realize that as mothers we can turn into metaphorical bears as Elinor’s actual form does in the film. We are brave enough to raise our claws and risk our own lives for our daughters. We will protect our daughters fiercely, like nature demonstrates with a mother bear and her cubs. We try to differentiate when to resort to “tooth and claw” and when maintaining decorum is required.</div>
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For many reasons, <span style="border: 0px; font-family: inherit; font-size: 12px; font-style: inherit; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; text-transform: uppercase; vertical-align: baseline;">BRAVE</span> might not be the “feminist film” we might have hoped for when we saw the previews of the brazen young woman riding bareback, shooting arrows directly to the bulls-eye with every pull on the bow. But it contains more depth of character in the female characters than that of Disney Princesses past. Feminism wears many faces and is not just about girls taking on what are considered traditionally boyish feats. Feminism can also be the strength of women like Elinor, who command respect for their intellect, and maybe even sew tapestries in their spare time. Being feminist is about what Merida says at the end of the film—it is being brave enough to see the greatness inside ourselves and to manifest it in the world. It is about being brave enough to support our sisters, friends and daughters as they, too, look bravely within, draw upon the strength of mother bears they find inside themselves, and manifest that strength in the world.<br />
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<i>Melissa Corliss Delorenzo contributed to this article. </i></div>
Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4000130281935557504.post-20878343852911761742012-11-29T20:44:00.000-05:002013-06-27T08:17:56.169-04:00Emma Darwin, a Life Imagined<br />
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Emma Darwin, a Life Imagined</h1>
<span class="post-date" style="border: 0px; display: block; font-family: inherit; font-style: inherit; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;"><a href="http://www.hercircleezine.com/2012/11/29/november-15-2012-2/" rel="bookmark" style="-webkit-transition: all 0.4s ease-in-out; border: 0px; color: #333333; font-family: inherit; font-style: inherit; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; text-decoration: none; transition: all 0.4s ease-in-out; vertical-align: baseline;" title="12:00 am"><time class="entry-date" datetime="2012-11-29T00:00:51+00:00" pubdate="">November 29, 2012</time></a><span class="byline" style="border: 0px; display: inline; font-family: inherit; font-style: inherit; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;"> by <span class="author vcard" style="border: 0px; font-family: inherit; font-style: inherit; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;"><a class="url fn n" href="http://www.hercircleezine.com/author/krobinson/" rel="author" style="-webkit-transition: all 0.4s ease-in-out; border: 0px; color: #333333; font-family: inherit; font-style: inherit; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; text-decoration: none; transition: all 0.4s ease-in-out; vertical-align: baseline;" title="View all posts by Kate Robinson">Kate Robinson</a></span></span></span></header><br />
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<a href="http://darwin-online.org.uk/EmmaDiaries.html" style="-webkit-transition: all 0.4s ease-in-out; border: 0px; color: #333333; font-family: inherit; font-style: inherit; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; text-decoration: none; transition: all 0.4s ease-in-out; vertical-align: baseline;"><img alt="" class="size-full wp-image-21487" height="260" src="http://www.hercircleezine.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/11/Emma1.jpg" style="border: 0px; display: block; height: auto; margin: 0px auto; max-width: 100%;" width="220" /></a><br />
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REPRODUCED WITH PERMISSION FROM JOHN VAN WYHE ED. 2002-. THE COMPLETE WORK OF CHARLES DARWIN ONLINE. (HTTP://DARWIN-ONLINE.ORG.UK/)</div>
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As we examine women’s contributions to history, we must be careful not to overstate or inflate their true involvement. With November marking the anniversary of Darwin’s publication of <span style="border: 0px; font-family: inherit; font-size: 12px; font-style: inherit; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; text-transform: uppercase; vertical-align: baseline;">ON THE ORIGIN OF SPECIES</span>, I wrote an article about Emma Darwin after reading that she was the deciding factor in Charles’ Darwin’s publication of the book. I was amazed that Darwin placed the manuscript for his monumental work into Emma’s hands, and more or less told her that he’d destroy the pages if she thought it heresy, since evolution flew in the face of their strong and shared religious beliefs. Thus, while Emma is known to have said that she felt what Charles was publishing would condemn them both to hell, she is claimed to have approved it regardless. Not only did she approve it, she made margin notes and asked questions or pointed out places that needed clarification.</div>
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It seems that some authors have taken what was essentially an editorial role, one played out by spouses throughout history, and claimed it for much more than it was. When I requested permission to use the image of Emma Darwin included herein, I mentioned my astonishment at the story, and received a reply from a Darwin scholar who was just as astonished. Dr. John van Wyhe, who is the director of <a href="http://darwin-online.org.uk/" style="-webkit-transition: all 0.4s ease-in-out; border: 0px; color: #333333; font-family: inherit; font-style: inherit; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; text-decoration: none; transition: all 0.4s ease-in-out; vertical-align: baseline;">The Complete Work of Charles Darwin Online</a>, wrote asking for my reference source. I sent him back the author’s name of a book about the Darwins. His reply confirmed that Emma’s influence and contributions have been overblown, and are a myth perpetuated like others about Darwin. He confirms that such rumors have been republished in a great many sources, and thus seem valid for their repeated publication. However, says Dr. van Wyhe, that does not make them true. (For a graduate student, this warning is apropos, and reminds me to seek a more reliable or first-hand source for information, rather than trust paraphrasing on behalf of another researcher.) And, in my own defense, since I had never heard this story before, and assumed it was another case of women being belittled in historical accounts, I sought the author’s source, which I could not find. Thus, I feel especially glad that I was prescient enough to mention the purpose and subject matter of the proposed article when I requested permission to use the image.</div>
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I know that I asked back in September that we demand from historians and academic publishers the whole story of history. I asked that marginal peoples be included, whether those were women involved in early union formation, stories from the black perspective in the civil rights movement, or various other minorities whose names are not famous and whose contributions are all but forgotten. However, I also do not want mountains made of proverbial molehills. We don’t need to imagine influence. Rather, I ask that the everyday experience of individuals who lived in particular times be considered. This makes me think of the <span style="border: 0px; font-family: inherit; font-size: 12px; font-style: inherit; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; text-transform: uppercase; vertical-align: baseline;">DIARY OF ANNE FRANK</span>. Her diary is not remarkable for any reason other than that she lived in an extraordinary time and recorded in her diary her lived experience as a Jewish person, and that the journal survived and made it to print. These are the stories of history that we need so that we understand the past in a way that helps us imagine and bring forth a better future. We don’t need fake, embellished or exalted stories. As with the relationship between Sally Hemmings and Thomas Jefferson, we may never know the reality of it or any of its truths. We may never know whether Emma Darwin had much influence over Charles’s publication of <span style="border: 0px; font-family: inherit; font-size: 12px; font-style: inherit; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; text-transform: uppercase; vertical-align: baseline;">ON THE ORIGIN OF SPECIES</span> like we know that Tabitha King weighs in on Stephen King’s stories before they reach the eye of a professional editor. As we seek to increase our knowledge not just of dates, places and famous male names, we should not make more of women’s contributions for the sake of imagining greatness. The plain story, like Anne Frank’s, is just as significant when viewed as a part of the overall history of a time and place.</div>
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Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4000130281935557504.post-13688969921150645542012-11-22T20:46:00.000-05:002013-06-27T08:17:37.106-04:00Joy Harjo's Poetry--Something for Which to be Thankful<br />
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Joy Harjo’s Poetry—Something for Which to be Thankful</h1>
<span class="post-date" style="border: 0px; display: block; font-family: inherit; font-style: inherit; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;"><time class="entry-date" datetime="2012-11-22T00:00:25+00:00" pubdate="" style="-webkit-transition: all 0.4s ease-in-out; border: 0px; color: #333333; font-family: inherit; font-style: inherit; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; text-decoration: none; transition: all 0.4s ease-in-out; vertical-align: baseline;">First published <a href="http://www.hercircleezine.com/2012/11/22/joy-harjos-poetry-something-for-which-to-be-thankful/" rel="bookmark" style="-webkit-transition: all 0.4s ease-in-out; border: 0px; color: #333333; font-family: inherit; font-style: inherit; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; text-decoration: none; transition: all 0.4s ease-in-out; vertical-align: baseline;" title="12:00 am">November 22, 2012</a></time><span class="byline" style="border: 0px; display: inline; font-family: inherit; font-style: inherit; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;"> at </span><a href="http://www.hercircleezine.com/2012/11/22/joy-harjos-poetry-something-for-which-to-be-thankful/">http://www.hercircleezine.com/2012/11/22/joy-harjos-poetry-something-for-which-to-be-thankful/</a></span></header><br />
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KATE’S KITCHEN TABLE, IN DETAIL</div>
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There are so many things for which I feel thankful. The poetry of amazingly talented women writers is one of these. It was over eight years ago that I first read <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Joy_Harjo" style="-webkit-transition: all 0.4s ease-in-out; border: 0px; color: #333333; font-family: inherit; font-style: inherit; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; text-decoration: none; transition: all 0.4s ease-in-out; vertical-align: baseline;">Joy Harjo</a>’s <span style="border: 0px; font-family: inherit; font-size: 12px; font-style: inherit; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; text-transform: uppercase; vertical-align: baseline;">PERHAPS THE WORLD ENDS HERE</span> in a book about Thanksgiving and creating family rituals to celebrate. To me, Thanksgiving is about gathering people together, sustaining one another with love and sharing the good fortune we have of plentiful food, and a home open to family, friends and strangers alike in which we may share such bounty.</div>
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Another other thing for which I’m thankful is the kitchen table. Joy Harjo captures the essence of the table in her poem, <span style="border: 0px; font-family: inherit; font-size: 12px; font-style: inherit; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; text-transform: uppercase; vertical-align: baseline;">PERHAPS THE WORLD ENDS HERE</span>, which she has graciously allowed me to reprint herein. My kitchen table (pictured in detail) with the paint, glue, marker and indentations from my children growing, creating, learning and discovering at it fills me with gratitude. At one time, my husband and I considered refinishing the table once the children were grown. Now, we cherish the marks. They remind us of the stages of our children’s lives. We revere the table itself, and give thanks for its solid-footed presence, its offering as a place and space where we are nourished, fight, make memories, dream and…oh, let the poem say it much more eloquently:</div>
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<strong style="border: 0px; font-family: inherit; font-style: inherit; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;">Perhaps the World Ends Here</strong><br />
By Joy Harjo</div>
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<span style="border: 0px; font-family: inherit; font-size: 12px; font-style: inherit; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; text-transform: uppercase; vertical-align: baseline;">THE WORLD BEGINS AT A KITCHEN TABLE. NO MATTER WHAT, WE MUST EAT TO LIVE.</span></div>
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<span style="border: 0px; font-family: inherit; font-size: 12px; font-style: inherit; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; text-transform: uppercase; vertical-align: baseline;">THE GIFTS OF THE EARTH ARE BROUGHT AND PREPARED, SET ON THE TABLE. SO IT HAS BEEN SINCE CREATION, AND IT WILL GO ON.</span></div>
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WE CHASE CHICKENS OR DOGS AWAY FROM IT. BABIES TEETHE AT THE CORNERS. THEY SCRAPE THEIR KNEES UNDER IT.</div>
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IT IS HERE THAT CHILDREN ARE GIVEN INSTRUCTION ON WHAT IT MEANS TO BE HUMAN. WE MAKE MEN AT IT, WE MAKE WOMEN.</div>
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AT THIS TABLE WE GOSSIP, RECALL ENEMIES AND THE GHOSTS OF LOVERS.</div>
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OUR DREAMS DRINK COFFEE WITH US AS THEY PUT THEIR ARMS AROUND OUR CHILDREN. THEY LAUGH WITH US AT OUR POOR FALLING-DOWN SELVES AND AS WE PUT OURSELVES BACK TOGETHER AGAIN AT THE TABLE.</div>
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THIS TABLE HAS BEEN A HOUSE IN THE RAIN, AN UMBRELLA IN THE SUN.</div>
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WARS HAVE BEGUN AND ENDED AT THIS TABLE. IT IS A PLACE TO HIDE IN THE SHADOW OF TERROR. A PLACE TO CELEBRATE THE TERRIBLE VICTORY.</div>
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WE HAVE GIVEN BIRTH ON THIS TABLE, AND HAVE PREPARED OUR PARENTS FOR BURIAL HERE.</div>
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AT THIS TABLE WE SING WITH JOY, WITH SORROW. WE PRAY OF SUFFERING AND REMORSE. WE GIVE THANKS.</div>
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<span style="border: 0px; font-family: inherit; font-size: 12px; font-style: inherit; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; text-transform: uppercase; vertical-align: baseline;">PERHAPS THE WORLD WILL END AT THE KITCHEN TABLE, WHILE WE ARE LAUGHING AND CRYING, EATING OF THE LAST SWEET BITE.</span></div>
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I want to specifically recognize Native Americans who do not necessarily view Thanksgiving in the same way as those whose ancestors were immigrants to this country. I do not wish to appropriate Joy Harjo’s poem and use it to gloss over the genocide of Native Americans and celebrate what many consider a specifically American holiday. Rather, outside of the historical context, may this day be one on which we feel sincere gratitude, especially for Native Americans who welcomed many of our ancestors, even though those ancestors eventually betrayed the generosity extended to them.</div>
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On this Thanksgiving of 2012, I wish you joy to sing at your own table, and hope your suffering and sorrows are few.</div>
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<strong style="border: 0px; font-family: inherit; font-style: inherit; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;"><span style="border: 0px; font-family: inherit; font-size: 12px; font-style: inherit; font-weight: inherit; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; text-transform: uppercase; vertical-align: baseline;">PERHAPS THE WORLD ENDS HERE</span> was originally published in <span style="border: 0px; font-family: inherit; font-size: 12px; font-style: inherit; font-weight: inherit; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; text-transform: uppercase; vertical-align: baseline;">THE WOMAN WHO FELL FROM THE SKY</span>, W.W. Norton, 1994.</strong></div>
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Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4000130281935557504.post-73143512103222712902012-11-15T20:51:00.000-05:002013-06-27T08:17:17.812-04:00"Sweet Hell on Fire" Book Review First published at <a href="http://www.hercircleezine.com/2012/11/15/sweet-hell-on-fire-a-memoir-of-the-prison-i-worked-in-and-the-prison-i-lived-in/">http://www.hercircleezine.com/2012/11/15/sweet-hell-on-fire-a-memoir-of-the-prison-i-worked-in-and-the-prison-i-lived-in/</a> on November 15, 2012.<br />
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<span style="background-color: white; color: #333333; font-family: inherit; font-size: 24px; font-style: inherit;">I read Sara Lunsford’s </span><span style="background-color: white; border: 0px; color: #333333; font-family: inherit; font-size: 12px; font-style: inherit; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; text-transform: uppercase; vertical-align: baseline;">SWEET HELL ON FIRE: A MEMOIR OF THE PRISON I WORKED IN AND THE PRISON I LIVED IN</span><span style="background-color: white; color: #333333; font-family: inherit; font-size: 24px; font-style: inherit;">, and loved this very different kind of memoir from a woman writer. Sara is promoting the book with a Virtual Book Tour this month, and inContext is happy to be a part of that. I had a few questions for Sara about the book: its contents, the writing process and her forays into publishing, which she kindly answered. As part of the Virtual Book Tour, inContext is pleased to announce a</span><span style="background-color: white; color: #333333; font-family: inherit; font-size: 24px; font-style: inherit;"> </span><span style="background-color: white; border: 0px; color: #333333; font-family: inherit; font-size: 12px; font-style: inherit; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; text-transform: uppercase; vertical-align: baseline;">BOOK GIVEAWAY</span><span style="background-color: white; color: #333333; font-family: inherit; font-size: 24px; font-style: inherit;">! Submit a comment on this interview and be entered to win a copy. The book will be mailed the first week of December, with names drawn November 30, 2012.</span><br />
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<a href="http://www.hercircleezine.com/2012/09/29/sweet-hell-on-fire-a-memoir-of-the-prison-i-worked-in-and-the-prison-i-lived-in/121115_sweet_hell_on_fire/" rel="attachment wp-att-22002" style="-webkit-transition: all 0.4s ease-in-out; border: 0px; color: #333333; font-family: inherit; font-style: inherit; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; text-decoration: none; transition: all 0.4s ease-in-out; vertical-align: baseline;"><img alt="" class="alignleft size-full wp-image-22002" height="225" src="http://www.hercircleezine.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/09/121115_sweet_hell_on_fire.jpg" style="border: 0px; display: inline; float: left; height: auto; margin-bottom: 1.5em; margin-right: 1.5em; margin-top: 1.5em; max-width: 100%;" title="121115_sweet_hell_on_fire" width="225" /></a><br />
<strong style="border: 0px; font-family: inherit; font-style: inherit; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;">Kate: What was the most difficult thing as a woman working in corrections?</strong><br />
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Sara: Most people would think that it would be getting used to seeing hundreds of naked men a day. That really wasn’t a big deal for me. We all have bodies and they all have to be washed, dressed, etc. What was the most difficult for me was I had to learn not to apply the behavior patterns of most of these men to all men. There are good and bad people, male and female, in prison and out. I had started to paint everyone with the same brush.<br />
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<strong style="border: 0px; font-family: inherit; font-style: inherit; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;">Kate: What do you think needs to be done to make corrections work more welcoming for women?</strong><br />
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Sara: Let me preface this by saying I know so many women who do The Job and do it well. I’d trust them with my life. But no one else needs to do anything to make corrections welcoming for women <span style="border: 0px; font-family: inherit; font-size: 12px; font-style: inherit; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; text-transform: uppercase; vertical-align: baseline;">EXCEPT WOMEN</span>. There are already adequate laws and policies in place. The perception that women are a risk and don’t belong in the environment isn’t going to change until so many of us stop getting involved with inmates and endangering our fellow officers. It isn’t always women that get caught up, but the majority of incidents with officer/inmate relations are women.<br />
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On the surface, it may seem like this isn’t a big deal. Aside from being a sex offense, because no one in your legal custody can consent to sexual activity, it leads to violence. This happens either through the introduction of contraband, inmates wanting the same thing other inmates are getting (sex, special privileges, etc.), or if the officer breaks off the affair. Riots have been started for less and that situation puts everyone’s life on the line.<br />
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<strong style="border: 0px; font-family: inherit; font-style: inherit; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;">Kate: How has your experience as a correction’s officer affected your life today? </strong><br />
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Sara: It’s affected me in so many ways. What I went through both personally and professionally was a baptism by fire. Those experiences made me actively choose the life I want and the person I want to be. <br />
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I took some of the little quirks of the job with me. I never sit with my back to a door, I won’t eat food I’ve left unattended, and I’m always planning in my head for any situation that could arise out of whatever is happening to me at the moment.<br />
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It’s made me a better writer, not only where craft is concerned, but it’s prepared me for people who don’t like my books and want to tell me about it personally. After having three hundred guys make disparaging comments about everything from my hair to the size of my butt, someone disliking my book is kind of passé as far as my ego is concerned.<br />
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<strong style="border: 0px; font-family: inherit; font-style: inherit; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;">Kate: Was the process of writing the book cathartic?</strong></div>
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Sara: It was most certainly cathartic. I didn’t think it would be. When I started writing, I thought it was going to be just like telling the other stories about things that have happened to me. It wasn’t. After I got into the meat of the project, there were times it was like picking open an old wound, but cutting deeper. Catharsis happened when I realized that everything that had happened to me had been for a reason. Seeing this project as a whole gave me purpose: to help other people. I know that there are people who have gone through worse than what I went through, people who are suffering and think it’s never going to get better. But it did for me. I came through. I’m still here. I am living my best life. If I can help them do the same, then it was worth it.<br />
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<strong style="border: 0px; font-family: inherit; font-style: inherit; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;">Kate: How did publishers react to your book? </strong><br />
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Sara: My agent and I did a round of submissions and we got a lot of great feedback. The subject material was too gritty for some. My book opens with me on my hands and knees in someone’s brain matter. That’s a tough read, but it’s how things happened. I didn’t sugar coat anything.<br />
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I actually did have one rejection that stayed in my head for a while. The editor said that she thought the “heroine” (me) was a know-it-all in the beginning and a know-it-all at the end and she didn’t learn anything and that was boring. That floored me because I learned so much about myself, love, redemption, forgiveness. The days in this book totally changed my life—me. <br />
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I’ve had a lot of people say that I’m strong, but I don’t know if that’s the case. I’ve just lived the life I’ve been given, tried to fix my mistakes and ultimately decided to be happy. But I’m not worried about receiving support. I’d rather be the one giving it. I’ve already crawled out of that pit. Yeah, some bad things happened to me, but they’re over and done with. They can’t be undone. I’m at peace with that. So the best thing, the right thing for me now is to have a voice for those who don’t and try to help others where I can.<br />
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<strong style="border: 0px; font-family: inherit; font-style: inherit; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;">Kate: Thanks for being so open with us and sharing your experiences. I wish you every success with your Virtual Book Tour.</strong><br />
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Sara: Thanks so much for having me at Her Circle.</div>
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<strong style="border: 0px; font-family: inherit; font-style: inherit; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;">Book Giveaway</strong><br />
Leave a comment at the bottom of this inContext interview anytime from November 15th-30th in order to qualify for a chance to win a copy of <span style="border: 0px; font-family: inherit; font-size: 12px; font-style: inherit; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; text-transform: uppercase; vertical-align: baseline;">SWEET HELL ON FIRE: A MEMOIR OF THE PRISON I WORKED IN AND THE PRISON I LIVED IN</span>. Entrants must be 18 years or older with an address in Canada or the United States. No purchase is necessary. The winner will be chosen randomly and notified by November 30, 2012. Her Circle Ezine respects your privacy and does not share email addresses with third parties.</div>
Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4000130281935557504.post-80129375635110223922012-11-08T23:30:00.000-05:002013-06-27T07:39:34.283-04:00Gains Made by Women in the 2012 Election<br />
<header class="entry-header" style="font-family: Quicksand, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><time class="entry-date" datetime="2012-11-08T00:00:27+00:00" pubdate="" style="border: 0px; font-family: inherit; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;"><i><span style="font-size: x-small;"><span style="color: #444444;"><span style="line-height: 51.1875px;">First published at </span></span><a href="http://www.hercircleezine.com/2012/11/08/gains-made-by-women-in-the-2012-election/" style="color: #333333; line-height: 24px;">http://www.hercircleezine.com/2012/11/08/gains-made-by-women-in-the-2012-election/</a> <a href="http://www.hercircleezine.com/2012/11/08/gains-made-by-women-in-the-2012-election/" rel="bookmark" style="border: 0px; color: #333333; font-family: inherit; line-height: 24px; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline;" title="12:00 am">November 8, 2012</a></span></i></time></header><br />
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We women went out and voted in record numbers in the election this week in the U.S. Women of all colors, ethnicities, races, socio-economic statuses and sexual orientations voted to re-elect President Obama. Likewise, women’s votes (and women candidates) made great strides with states like New Hampshire sending all women senators and representatives to Washington, and also electing a woman Governor. Landmark evens like the election of Massachusetts’ first female senator in candidate Elizabeth Warren and the election of openly lesbian candidate Tammy Baldwin were standard in this election instead of a single incidence across the country. The voices of the less-often-heard-from were heard loud and clear in the act of voting.</div>
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Maine, Washington and Maryland passed laws adding these states to the number that allow same-sex marriage. Minnesota defeated a measure that would have defined marriage through a Constitutional amendment as between one man and one woman. While the fact that these things come to a popular vote on a ballot remains disturbing, steps forward cannot be denied with these positive results.</div>
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Republican candidates who make bogus claims about biology, which they clearly do not understand in even the most rudimentary manner, were ousted from positions and lost their elections. Those who would claim that “legitimate” rape (a phrase some of us are still wondering about the meaning of) cannot result in pregnancy were schooled on what happens when their views about abortion itself get taken to an extreme and demonstrate their ignorance of basic biological science. Those who claimed that women who underwent abortions after discovering pregnancies after rape were punishing the child or not valuing “God’s gift,” learned that not only are women tired of men trying to determine what goes on in their bodies, but also that we’re tired of being blamed as victims of what is a violent crime.</div>
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As if all of this news about gains made by women in office was not enough, I want to share something personal about this election. At 1:43a.m. EST on November 7, 2012, while I listened to news reports and the President’s acceptance speech, my daughter who is away at college sent me a text saying, “For the first time, really, I am proud to say I’m an American! And, it feels so good to be able to say that!” At that moment, I thought back to September 11, 2001 when the terrorist attacks occurred. That was when my daughter’s faith in her country began to wane—at the ripe age of six! Over the years, she has been grateful for our country and its freedoms, for the efforts of our troops in every conflict throughout history and for keeping us safe at home. She has appreciated the open discussion even if it has turned nasty at times. She’s appreciated the freedom to express her opinion, and realizes the privilege it is to live in a country where she, as a woman, will be able to vote at eighteen, and can seek not only education, but also have an almost equal chance at finding a job with that college education as a woman. (Some might argue that she’d be more likely than a man to get a job, while others would say that she’d get the job, but only because she’d work for 77% of what a man would be paid for the same position.) These (and more) benefits of being a citizen of the United States have not been lost on her. However, in this election, even more than in 2008, her hope (yes, that word from the Obama campaign) that real change can occur has been realized. She has not only come of age when this nation elected the first African American President, but also then re-elected him, and sent more women into Congress and various legislatures across the country. Here’s to you, women voters of America!</div>
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Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4000130281935557504.post-75421038630992087492012-10-18T20:55:00.000-04:002013-06-27T08:16:48.282-04:00Progressive Nuns?<br />
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Progressive Nuns?</h1>
<span class="post-date" style="border: 0px; display: block; font-family: inherit; font-style: inherit; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;"><time class="entry-date" datetime="2012-10-18T00:00:55+00:00" pubdate="" style="-webkit-transition: all 0.4s ease-in-out; border: 0px; color: #333333; font-family: inherit; font-style: inherit; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; text-decoration: none; transition: all 0.4s ease-in-out; vertical-align: baseline;">First published <a href="http://www.hercircleezine.com/2012/10/18/october-11-2012/" rel="bookmark" style="-webkit-transition: all 0.4s ease-in-out; border: 0px; color: #333333; font-family: inherit; font-style: inherit; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; text-decoration: none; transition: all 0.4s ease-in-out; vertical-align: baseline;" title="12:00 am">October 18, 2012</a></time><span class="byline" style="border: 0px; display: inline; font-family: inherit; font-style: inherit; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;"> at </span><a href="http://www.hercircleezine.com/2012/10/18/october-11-2012/">http://www.hercircleezine.com/2012/10/18/october-11-2012/</a></span></header><br />
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Like many feminists, I never thought I’d use the word “progressive” to describe Catholic nuns. However, after learning about the Leadership Conference of Women Religious (LCWR), I have to say that I’m amazed at the work of this group. While connected to the Catholic faith, LCWR works to promote women in the Catholic religion as leaders. The group also participates in humanitarian efforts. Another surprise is that this group expands the focus of “right to life” issues to include working toward the eradication of hunger, repealing of the death penalty where it exists, and stopping war. Additionally, the Leadership Conference of Women Religious believes that fetal rights are not the only consideration where abortion is concerned. And, the LCWR hopes to influence the Catholic Church in its acceptance of homosexuality to welcome all peoples rather then condemning them.</div>
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These stances are indeed radical for Catholicism and have placed the LCWR at odds with the Vatican. In fact, American bishops have been sent by the Vatican to oversee the organization to attempt to bring the group into line with what the Vatican considers the Church’s teachings. Specifically, the Vatican charges the LCWR with going against Church doctrine on issues related to homosexuality, birth control and what they consider radical feminist thought that stems from the organization. To their credit, the LCWR is more than willing to begin a dialogue with the Vatican about Catholic doctrine, yet (no surprise here) the Vatican would rather issue mandates versus discuss anything at all. This stance proves that the Vatican remains anti-woman, of course.</div>
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The Leadership Conference of Women Religious believes the Church must evolve (pun intended—I couldn’t help myself!) to meet the society and culture in which we live today. The nuns who are part of the LCWR claim that their work at the front lines of humanitarian efforts put them in touch with the lives of people as they are lived, not as one might merely desire them to be. For over forty years, the LCWR has advocated for the ordination of women. Much of that time, the group has been relatively silent about their desire for leadership. Even while they are publicly silent, leaders with the LCWR continue to ask themselves and one another about what it means that the Vatican and church leadership seem to fear women and not value their leadership potential.</div>
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The most surprising aspect of what I learned about the Leadership Conference of Women Religious is that while many in the group work toward asking women to choose to continue pregnancies over aborting them, there are a significant number of nuns who consider the rights of those already born as just as important and significant as those of the unborn. The LCWR claims that policies and positions that are pro-fetus versus pro-life need to be reconsidered. They consider hunger, war and the death penalty as just as important to the Catholic conversation about being pro-life as abortion.</div>
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Even as I remain an atheist feminist, I find it encouraging that women, who belong to what are considered anti-women faiths, still work toward empowering women within their faith. That the Leadership Conference for Women Religious continues to ask for not only power, but also a dialogue with the Church on issues related to their experience working with people directly is inspiring. I’m not sure I’d have the patience to work so tirelessly for decades, and I admire the faith of the nuns in the LCWR that allows them to remain committed to their religion even as they work to change it so that it reflects more of who they are rather than merely accepting the doctrines of Catholicism on blind faith.</div>
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Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4000130281935557504.post-86974248277853769242012-10-18T20:54:00.000-04:002013-06-27T08:17:03.421-04:00Some Assembly (and Possibly Some Revision) Required<div style="background-color: white; border: 0px; color: #333333; font-family: Quicksand, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 16px; line-height: 24px; margin-bottom: 1.5em; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;">
First published at <a href="http://www.hercircleezine.com/2012/10/25/october-18-2012/" style="background-color: transparent;">http://www.hercircleezine.com/2012/10/25/october-18-2012/</a> on October 18, 2012. </div>
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In Annie Lamott’s <span style="border: 0px; font-family: inherit; font-size: 12px; font-style: inherit; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; text-transform: uppercase; vertical-align: baseline;">SOME ASSEMBLY REQUIRED</span> (with Sam Lamott, Riverhead Books, 2012), the author writes, “To have mothered this young father fills me with visceral feelings of awe, joy and dread.” This statement sums up my own feelings about parenthood. I’m regularly awed when I consider the growth of my children over the years. Sure, you don’t notice each day specifically, that quarter inch of height or the reduction of the curved belly of toddlerhood into the taught stomach of adolescence. Yet, when you stop and consider your child, at whatever stage or point of development, both physical and otherwise, you can’t help except be awed at the utter strangeness of it all, even as it is mundane and expected. It’s like watching a sunrise or sunset, really. I mean, sure the sun is going to rise and set, yet when we take the time to see it, that, too, can be visceral and awesome.</div>
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This “visceral” nature of parenting is what I believe is at the heart of this past summer’s “having it all” hoopla. Arguing against brain chemistry having much to do with male and female response to what is perceived as “danger” for their children, I believe it is social conditioning. Men take “flight” and go to work (and remain there) in response to the needs of their children. Women, in contrast, are socialized to “fight” and to remain at home (or at their children’s school or hospital bedside) and to leave work behind.</div>
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So, what is feminism supposed to make of both the male and female visceral feeling of parenthood? I think feminism needs to lead the discussion to our social and cultural mores and normalize the different responses to parenting exhibited by individuals. We cannot see fathers who work as supporting families and mothers who work as abandoning them. Maybe as we watch Marissa Meyer take the helm of a major corporation even as she becomes a mother to another child, we don’t judge her or say she’s setting us all up. Maybe her response, though culturally and socially outside the norm for women, is to charge headlong into work upon delivering, in the same way we would laud a man for doing. At the same time, we need to make room for more men to join the ranks of the stay-at-home parents, who remain in place with their young children, rather than go off to work.</div>
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In order to accept and commend both roles, a sea change the likes of which all this debate of “having it all” has been about is required. That sea change, though, is not just business and government enacting policy. The sea change is Lamott’s visceral feeling. We must open our hearts and minds to these differences in individuals, and not claim they’re mandated by gender. We need to revise our thinking about the value of unpaid work in this world. We need to value the care a home requires, and the care required by children. This way, we don’t give everyone the “right” to work, while still demeaning the caregiving role.</div>
Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4000130281935557504.post-2749161460355443442012-10-11T23:32:00.000-04:002013-06-27T07:39:18.607-04:00Voting and Issues Related to Birth Control and Abortion Access<br />
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<time class="entry-date" datetime="2012-10-11T00:00:45+00:00" pubdate="" style="-webkit-transition: all 0.4s ease-in-out; border: 0px; color: #333333; font-family: inherit; font-size: 16px; font-style: inherit; line-height: 24px; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; transition: all 0.4s ease-in-out; vertical-align: baseline;">First published <a href="http://www.hercircleezine.com/2012/10/11/voting-and-issues-related-to-birth-control-and-abortion-access/" rel="bookmark" style="-webkit-transition: all 0.4s ease-in-out; border: 0px; color: #333333; font-family: inherit; font-style: inherit; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; text-decoration: none; transition: all 0.4s ease-in-out; vertical-align: baseline;" title="12:00 am">October 11, 2012</a></time><span class="byline" style="border: 0px; color: #333333; display: inline; font-family: inherit; font-size: 16px; font-style: inherit; line-height: 24px; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;"> </span><a href="http://www.hercircleezine.com/2012/10/11/voting-and-issues-related-to-birth-control-and-abortion-access/" style="font-family: inherit; font-size: 16px; font-style: inherit; line-height: 24px;">http://www.hercircleezine.com/2012/10/11/voting-and-issues-related-to-birth-control-and-abortion-access/</a></h1>
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Jennifer Granholm, former Michigan governor, television host and visiting professor at the University of California at Berkley, wrote about what she calls sexual McCarthyism of legislative efforts since the 2010 election in the federal and state congresses. Toward the end of her <a href="http://www.politico.com/news/stories/0312/73894.html" style="-webkit-transition: all 0.4s ease-in-out; border: 0px; color: #333333; font-family: inherit; font-style: inherit; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; text-decoration: none; transition: all 0.4s ease-in-out; vertical-align: baseline;" target="_blank">article</a>, she cited opinion polls that show President Obama ahead of all Republican candidates amongst women voters. She wrote that women “may need to fight the same fight their grandmothers fought in the 60’s.” Lastly, she says that women will be out en-force to vote in the next election, assuming that the votes from women will go to pro-woman, progressive candidates.</div>
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While I realize that opinion polls are used far and wide in coverage of election issues, and help candidates decide on which issues they should focus or highlight in campaign materials, I’m concerned about the gender-specific nature of the rhetoric about the upcoming election in the U.S. where funding of Planned Parenthood and legislation around abortion access and birth control are concerned. Sure, not too many of our grandfathers were necessarily promoting access to abortion in the same numbers as our grandmothers. There weren’t so many grandfathers out there advocating for birth control access, either. It was a different time, and yes, I will use that pat phrase to sum up what would take several articles to address as to the actions (or non-actions) of many men around these issues that certainly have an impact on men just as much as they do on women.</div>
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I will ride this tangent for a moment, though, as I consider why more men are not out there writing about and advocating for women’s access to abortion and birth control. What is your first thought about a man who stands up on a sidewalk or walks in a march carrying a “pro” birth control pill banner? Well, plenty of guys who do this kind of thing are accused of desiring less responsibility for themselves. The same holds true for abortion. Any man who “advocates for” or supports abortion rights might be viewed as someone who merely wants the woman to “take care of” an unplanned pregnancy. In these two areas, men can’t win. If they’re against either, they are seen as against women. I believe that men should not have a say in what I do with my body. No man should have any say about me using birth control to avoid pregnancy. Not a priest, not the president and not even her husband should have any say in whether a woman continues a pregnancy either. That said, men are then caught in a quandary as they may be called upon to support offspring they never intended. And, <span style="border: 0px; font-family: inherit; font-size: 12px; font-style: inherit; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; text-transform: uppercase; vertical-align: baseline;">THAT</span> said, I believe that the decision must always rest with the woman, and so that any man engaging in heterosexual sex must be aware of the possible consequences. He must be ready to embrace either the loss of his potential child or the prospect of supporting a child he does not necessarily want. That’s just part of being a responsible partner in heterosexual sex.</div>
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Now that I’ve given men a “free pass” where public advocacy is concerned for abortion or birth control issues, that doesn’t give men an excuse to not become part of the political movement to which many women, including Ms. Granholm (and this author) belong. We need men to not only run the risk of being accused of controlling women in the opposite manner when they advocate for birth control and abortion access, but also to get out and vote for candidates who are going to protect and not jeopardize women’s need for greater access and less restriction for both birth control and abortion. The U.S. election is less than a month from now. Vote to protect the rights of women.</div>
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Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4000130281935557504.post-63564889840802720662012-10-04T23:34:00.000-04:002013-06-27T07:38:57.484-04:00"Odd Girl Out" Book Review and Reflection<br />
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Last week, we looked at Title IX and the impact it has had for women on the playing field, in the classroom and in the faculty offices of colleges. While I mentioned poverty as a place from which stories are not often told, in addition to the contributions of women to causes, there are other “minority” statuses that are often excluded. One of these is the status of non-white women in sports and in college, and the other is the marginal position of lesbian women. This week, we’ll look at <span style="border: 0px; font-family: inherit; font-size: 12px; font-style: inherit; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; text-transform: uppercase; vertical-align: baseline;">ODD GIRL OUT</span>, which was a pulp novel and yet which voiced the feelings of many women in the 1960s.</div>
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<a href="http://www.annbannon.com/books-intro-oddgirlout.html" style="-webkit-transition: all 0.4s ease-in-out; border: 0px; color: #333333; font-family: inherit; font-style: inherit; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; text-decoration: none; transition: all 0.4s ease-in-out; vertical-align: baseline;">Ann Bannon</a> is the pen name of a woman author who published a series of books about young lesbian coeds in the late 1950s and early 1960s. Her books, of course, flew under the radar of serious reviewers, yet gained a steady following and readership. Like books today that baffle publishing houses and professional reviewers alike, the popularity of the “Beebo Brinker Chronicles” also surprised even the author herself. Bannon wrote from her experience, fresh out of college, with suspicions about her classmates’ sexual orientation, and a curiosity about a way of life that she did not dare consider seriously herself.</div>
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Bannon’s books captivate readers and researchers, who marvel at the early forays into the lesbian experience that her books explore. Readers find kindred, albeit dated, spirits in characters such as Laura in <span style="border: 0px; font-family: inherit; font-size: 12px; font-style: inherit; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; text-transform: uppercase; vertical-align: baseline;">ODD GIRL OUT</span>. These young women found themselves disarmingly not attracted to men, and just as disarmingly attracted to women. Their lesbian experiences were often quiet amongst women themselves, some of whom were merely experimenting with what, especially at the time, was “safe sex” where they would not earn a reputation. For others, these experiences were an awakening to the sexuality that confused them, and that they had attempted to deny. For this reason, the early inklings of lesbian leanings, as presented by Laura in <span style="border: 0px; font-family: inherit; font-size: 12px; font-style: inherit; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; text-transform: uppercase; vertical-align: baseline;">ODD GIRL OUT</span>, allowed many readers to finally feel normal about their own feelings of love for and attraction to women.</div>
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Bannon writes in the introduction to <span style="border: 0px; font-family: inherit; font-size: 12px; font-style: inherit; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; text-transform: uppercase; vertical-align: baseline;">ODD GIRL OUT</span> that she was touched by letters she’d receive from women who thanked her for making them feel normal—finally. She shares with us that the women who wrote to her expressed gratitude for her frankness, which helped them have hope for love in their own lives. The author admits that she, herself, used her characters to explore what she felt was also forbidden to her. She could be a butch lesbian through a character in a book, and she could experience lesbian love and sex this way, as well.</div>
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Reading <span style="border: 0px; font-family: inherit; font-size: 12px; font-style: inherit; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; text-transform: uppercase; vertical-align: baseline;">ODD GIRL OUT</span>, and especially Bannon’s introduction, I am reminded (again) of the stories of women being marginalized. Even as lesbianism and bisexuality is touted as “hot” in the mainstream world of young women today, it is through the lens of male beholders and for male entertainment. Lesbians, especially those who do not conform to the standards of femininity in our society, still face the discrimination and marginalization they always have endured. Books like <span style="border: 0px; font-family: inherit; font-size: 12px; font-style: inherit; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; text-transform: uppercase; vertical-align: baseline;">ODD GIRL OUT</span> give voice to lesbians coming to terms with their burgeoning sexuality, as they normalize the feelings of these women—feelings that are personal, internal, connected to the heart and not lesbianism as public display for entertainment.</div>
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The other aspect of <span style="border: 0px; font-family: inherit; font-size: 12px; font-style: inherit; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; text-transform: uppercase; vertical-align: baseline;">ODD GIRL OUT</span> I’d like to discuss is the fact that as we have more acceptance of alternative sexuality than ever before, some of this labels men and women, when in the past it did not. Bannon’s character, Laura, discovers herself as a lesbian. However, her female partner, Beth, while she enjoys her sexual exploits with Laura, is ultimately not a lesbian. In decades past, men engaging in sexual acts with men in adolescence were not labeled. Female junior high, high school and college students could engage in same-sex interactions, and actually never think of themselves as lesbian. Today, it seems, if one even “practices kissing” with a classmate or friend, sexuality comes into question right away. I think that as we move toward acceptance and understanding of varieties of sexuality, we need to resist labeling until we are more developed. It seems quaint to read about Bannon’s characters engaging in same-sex interactions, even while many of them never questioned their end-game sexuality. Certainly, women may learn that their friend with whom they practiced kissing grows up to embrace a lesbian lifestyle, while she embraces that of heterosexuality. This should also be considered normal development.</div>
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This is the last of my four-part series exploring the books required for a U.S. Women’s History course offered by the University of Maine, Farmington. I’ve invited students from the course to contribute guest posts later in the semester to inContext, so we may hear some fresh voices that further explore some of the topics we’ve covered. I hope readers of inContext have enjoyed this series, and are heartened that rather than the standard U.S. History course in college, that the University of Maine at Farmington includes this offering, which is a more inclusive and personal history, and tells the story of ordinary lives and people, especially women, who have made great strides and contributed a great deal to the status of women in our current society and culture.</div>
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First publication: <a href="http://www.hercircleezine.com/2012/10/04/part-4-of-u-s-womens-history-odd-girl-out/">http://www.hercircleezine.com/2012/10/04/part-4-of-u-s-womens-history-odd-girl-out/</a></div>
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Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4000130281935557504.post-50222170234563458422012-10-01T23:36:00.000-04:002013-06-27T07:38:39.262-04:00"The Boy Kings: A Journey Into the Heart of the Social Network" - Book Review and Reflection<br />
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<a href="http://www.hercircleezine.com/2012/10/01/the-boy-kings-a-journey-into-the-heart-of-the-social-network-by-katherine-losse/theboykings/" rel="attachment wp-att-21907" style="-webkit-transition: all 0.4s ease-in-out; border: 0px; color: #333333; font-family: inherit; font-size: 16px; font-style: inherit; line-height: 24px; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; text-decoration: none; transition: all 0.4s ease-in-out; vertical-align: baseline;"><img alt="" class="alignleft size-full wp-image-21907" height="444" src="http://www.hercircleezine.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/09/TheBoyKings.jpeg" style="border: 0px; display: inline; float: left; height: auto; margin-bottom: 1.5em; margin-right: 1.5em; margin-top: 1.5em; max-width: 100%;" width="250" /></a></h1>
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In <span style="border: 0px; font-family: inherit; font-size: 12px; font-style: inherit; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; text-transform: uppercase; vertical-align: baseline;">THE BOY KINGS: A JOURNEY INTO THE HEART OF THE SOCIAL NETWORK</span> (Free Press, 2012), <a href="http://www.theboykings.com/about/" style="-webkit-transition: all 0.4s ease-in-out; border: 0px; color: #333333; font-family: inherit; font-style: inherit; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; text-decoration: none; transition: all 0.4s ease-in-out; vertical-align: baseline;">Katherine Losse</a>describes her experiences working at Facebook shortly after it began and moved into office space (after its birth in a Harvard dorm room). If you’ve seen the film <span style="border: 0px; font-family: inherit; font-size: 12px; font-style: inherit; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; text-transform: uppercase; vertical-align: baseline;">THE SOCIAL NETWORK</span>, you know that Facebook began as a way for Harvard males* to “find” eligible females, and to also rate women based on their appearance. That Losse would not realize that she was entering the proverbial “heart of darkness” where women are concerned when she took the job at Facebook seems suspect. Yet, to the author’s credit, the book is not actually about the sexism rampant at the company, at least in the early days. It is more a series of rhetorical questions that she asks herself, then answers in the book as she poses the same questions for us to answer for ourselves. Losse admits that she long harbored thoughts of writing about Facebook, and I wish she was more upfront and less ambiguous about that intention (like <a href="http://www.tedconover.com/book-newjack/" style="-webkit-transition: all 0.4s ease-in-out; border: 0px; color: #333333; font-family: inherit; font-style: inherit; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; text-decoration: none; transition: all 0.4s ease-in-out; vertical-align: baseline;">Ted Conover</a> who became a correctional officer to write “from the inside” about that role). *<span style="border: 0px; font-family: inherit; font-size: 12px; font-style: inherit; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; text-transform: uppercase; vertical-align: baseline;">I FIND IT DIFFICULT TO REFER TO THEM AS MEN AND YET ALSO DON’T WANT TO COME ACROSS AS DEROGATORILY DISMISSIVE AND CALL THEM BOYS.</span></div>
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As described by Losse, network definitely describes Facebook, yet social? She questions the idea that we can be truly, or more accurately, authentically social on-line. This is a valid question, and one that is addressed slightly more academically by<a href="http://www.mit.edu/~sturkle/" style="-webkit-transition: all 0.4s ease-in-out; border: 0px; color: #333333; font-family: inherit; font-style: inherit; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; text-decoration: none; transition: all 0.4s ease-in-out; vertical-align: baseline;">Sherry Turkle</a>. I believe Losse’s book is more accessible possibly to a younger generation than Turkle’s book, and it is valuable as a first-person experience and individual reflection about life on-line. However, even while I appreciate the insights Losse provides, I can’t help but feel like she didn’t “infiltrate” merely to provide the insider story, but rather drank the Kool-aide and was brought into the cult for a time.</div>
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The title gives everything away with regard to how the author felt about working at Facebook. It was a bastion of boyhood, complete with the requisite adolescent fantasy of refrigerators filled with sugary, caffeinated beverages and bins of every kind of snack food and candy an eleven year old might dream of. She was the lone seeker of fresh fruit, which she describes as most often rotting before it was consumed. Then, there were the cartoon-graffiti pictures on the walls, including those exaggerating the female form for the male gaze. It is as if Ms. Losse saw herself as the Wendy to the lost boys. She not only describes her “female” suggestion of real food but also remarks at one point, “You can’t run a successful company with boys alone,” referring to her role as one of the few females in the office. Facebook is described as a gadget-filled, bed-time-less and far from wholesome Neverland, and Losse is the stand-in mother.</div>
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The more obvious things about Facebook that we all likely know already (or suspect) are included in the book, as well. Facts and figures about time women spend studying other women’s profiles and pictures versus the lack of time spent by men pursuing such activities are provided. The more esoteric information Losse shares includes Facebook’s policy around group pages, and how they determine whether a group is a hate group or not. We don’t have to wonder about why teens and twenty-somethings post drunken photos on Facebook; the activity is something Facebook employees do, and, well, they have good jobs, right? The “fun” it seems everyone is having working at Facebook is also debunked as it becomes clear that more often than not the male employees have fun, and the women do the menial, hourly paid work. Additionally, everyone is expected to wear company shirts for photo ops, and there is never, ever a company event or even normal work day when photos and videos are not taken for posting on the site. Employees were encouraged to not just blur, but rather erase the line between their personal lives and professional lives.</div>
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Like Losse, this is my criticism of Facebook. My college freshman daughter believes that because her friends from high school (who are at other colleges) are posting pictures and status’ depicting “fun, fun, fun,” that she’s the only one of her friends who has rough days being far away from home on her own for the first time. I asked her whether she ever posted anything authentic and genuine or that might demonstrate emotions such as insecurity or sadness (or anything other than sarcasm or utter joy). She realized that since she never admits to any of these human, emerging-adult kinds of emotions, that it is likely her friends also feel them and don’t post them. Losse actually experimented with posting less-than-ecstatic snippets of thoughts, and found that no one noticed, or that they brushed it off. While their comments were good-natured, they were still snide and didn’t address the actual emotional content of her original message.</div>
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(<span style="border: 0px; font-family: inherit; font-size: 12px; font-style: inherit; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; text-transform: uppercase; vertical-align: baseline;">IN THE INTEREST OF FULL DISCLOSURE, I CLOSED MY FACEBOOK ACCOUNT MONTHS AGO. AND, YES, I KNOW HOW TO REALLY CLOSE OUT AN ACCOUNT “FOR REAL” AND COMPLETELY. I ALSO KNOW NOW, TOO, THAT FACEBOOK MAY STILL RETAIN CERTAIN PIECES OF INFORMATION ABOUT ME EVEN THOUGH I DELETED INFORMATION FROM EVERY CATEGORY AND “UNFRIENDED” EVERYONE IN MY LIST BEFORE CLOSING THE ACCOUNT. OH, AND FACEBOOK EMPLOYEES CAN (AND DO) ACCESS ANY ACCOUNT THEY WANT, INCLUDING WHAT YOU MIGHT HAVE THOUGHT WERE “PRIVATE” E-MAILS THROUGH THE SITE.</span>)</div>
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Some portions of this review sound negative and like I’m harping on the author. This is not my intention, as I think Losse’s book is a memoir that speaks significantly about important issues related to social networks and our on-line lives today. She points out the sexism rampant at Facebook, especially in its early days. Today, (we can hope) that the teams of lawyers have at least included a sexual harassment policy in an employee handbook. I’m sure stockholders wouldn’t be too happy if this wasn’t something that was not only included, but also enforced to some degree. Maybe a few more of the paintings have been retired to men’s restrooms (as if that makes it any better). While writers (and reviewers) certainly aim for clarity, the “loss of the true intention” is something that digital communication (e-mail, Facebook posts, texts and Tweets) has brought to our world. Losse shares a valid and poignant view of what this means to an individual person, which I believe is her over-arching point: the loss of the meaning of and value of whole, real, complicated human friendship and interaction and what this means for our individual and collective futures. Eventually, as biological creatures, we all need sleep and nutritious food. We must determine for ourselves whether we want a boy king running things or whether we’re actually ready for the “wild rumpus” to end.</div>
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<span style="border: 0px; font-family: inherit; font-size: 12px; font-style: inherit; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; text-transform: uppercase; vertical-align: baseline;">THE BOY KINGS: A JOURNEY INTO THE HEART OF THE SOCIAL NETWORK</span> by Katherine Losse, 2012, is available from Free Press(a division of Simon and Schuster)</div>
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First published: <a href="http://www.hercircleezine.com/2012/10/01/the-boy-kings-a-journey-into-the-heart-of-the-social-network-by-katherine-losse/">http://www.hercircleezine.com/2012/10/01/the-boy-kings-a-journey-into-the-heart-of-the-social-network-by-katherine-losse/</a></div>
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Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4000130281935557504.post-6972187070819478562012-09-27T20:57:00.000-04:002013-06-27T08:16:37.658-04:00The Triangle Fire and Title IX Book Reviews<br />
<header class="entry-header" style="color: #333333; font-family: Quicksand, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 16px; line-height: 24px;"><span class="post-date" style="border: 0px; display: block; font-family: inherit; font-style: inherit; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;"><time class="entry-date" datetime="2012-09-27T00:00:14+00:00" pubdate="" style="-webkit-transition: all 0.4s ease-in-out; border: 0px; color: #333333; font-family: inherit; font-style: inherit; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; text-decoration: none; transition: all 0.4s ease-in-out; vertical-align: baseline;">First published <a href="http://www.hercircleezine.com/2012/09/27/u-s-womens-history-part-3-the-triangle-fire-and-title-ix/" rel="bookmark" style="-webkit-transition: all 0.4s ease-in-out; border: 0px; color: #333333; font-family: inherit; font-style: inherit; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; text-decoration: none; transition: all 0.4s ease-in-out; vertical-align: baseline;" title="12:00 am">September 27, 2012</a></time><span class="byline" style="border: 0px; display: inline; font-family: inherit; font-style: inherit; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;"> at </span><a href="http://www.hercircleezine.com/2012/09/27/u-s-womens-history-part-3-the-triangle-fire-and-title-ix/">http://www.hercircleezine.com/2012/09/27/u-s-womens-history-part-3-the-triangle-fire-and-title-ix/</a></span></header><br />
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This is Part 3 of our exploration of texts used by the University of Maine, Farmington course, U.S. Women’s History. We examine two of the Bedford Series in History and Culture: <span style="border: 0px; font-family: inherit; font-size: 12px; font-style: inherit; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; text-transform: uppercase; vertical-align: baseline;">THE TRIANGLE FIRE</span> by Jo Ann Argersinger and <span style="border: 0px; font-family: inherit; font-size: 12px; font-style: inherit; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; text-transform: uppercase; vertical-align: baseline;">TITLE IX</span> by Susan Ware.</div>
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<strong style="border: 0px; font-family: inherit; font-style: inherit; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;"><span style="border: 0px; font-family: inherit; font-size: 12px; font-style: inherit; font-weight: inherit; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; text-transform: uppercase; vertical-align: baseline;">THE TRIANGLE FIRE</span></strong><br />
<a href="http://www.hercircleezine.com/2012/08/19/september-20-2012/images-1-5/" rel="attachment wp-att-21452" style="-webkit-transition: all 0.4s ease-in-out; border: 0px; color: #333333; font-family: inherit; font-style: inherit; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; text-decoration: none; transition: all 0.4s ease-in-out; vertical-align: baseline;"><img alt="" class="alignright size-full wp-image-21452" height="275" src="http://www.hercircleezine.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/08/images-1.jpeg" style="border: 0px; display: inline; float: right; height: auto; margin-bottom: 1.5em; margin-left: 1.5em; margin-top: 1.5em; max-width: 100%;" width="183" /></a><br />
When we think of unions, we likely think of men in the trades. The construction, electric and plumbing trades particularly sit at the forefront of our thinking. We think of these organizations as protecting male workers and their interests. We also see them as male bastions, where the few women who do join their ranks are hassled and goaded for years before being even grudgingly accepted by just a few fellow members. However, women strikers and union members actually galvanized the men, and, much of what we know as workplace protections today stem from the public outcry as the result of what is known as the “Triangle Fire,” in which 146 workers were killed, the majority of whom were women.</div>
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In the factories, which were in the upper floors of New York buildings, girls as young as twelve worked days the hours of which equaled their age in years. Conditions were cramped, sometimes unsanitary, and included spaces that were sweltering in summer and cruelly cold in winter. To meet space regulations that were in place, the cubic space of a room was considered, not the floor space alone. This meant that with higher ceilings, more equipment and workers were crammed into floors not meant to accommodate such crowding. Wages were paltry, and companies regularly dismissed workers who complained, attempted to change conditions or who were even thought to be considering union membership. In 1909, twenty thousand women factory workers went on strike for recognition for the ILGWU (International Ladies’ Garment Workers’ Union), better wages and improved working conditions. This was the first strike by women for women and through the strike efforts, barriers such as ethnic differences between workers were put aside. The strike of 1909 influenced male cloakmakers, who went on strike the following year. One of the protest songs, states “and we gave courage to the men, who carried on in nineteen-ten.”</div>
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On Saturday, March 25, 1911 at closing time, a fire started. The Triangle Fire was the deadliest work-related tragedy in NYC from its occurrence until the 9/11/01 tragedy. Public outrage continued for years after the Triangle Fire. The media continued coverage in newspapers and magazines. When no responsibility was actually taken by anyone involved in factory ownership or within the City itself, writers posted headlines such as, “147 Dead, Nobody Guilty.”</div>
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Even if the owners of the company could not be prosecuted successfully, the public outrage was such that committees and groups formed in response. Women such as Pauline Newman, Clara Lemlich and Rose Schneiderman served on the newly minted Factory Investigating Commission (FIC). These women forced others on the committee to tour factory buildings and see firsthand the lack of safety procedures and cramped conditions. Frances Perkins witnessed the fire. She later served as the first female industrial commissioner and then as the first female secretary of labor under Franklin Roosevelt first as Governor of New York and the latter when he was President.</div>
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Elizabeth Dutcher, who worked with the WTUL (Women’s Trade Union League), the Red Cross and the ILGWU, investigated the lives of the shirtwaist makers who were victims of the Triangle fire. It was thought that women who worked in the factories often did so for frivolous reasons, such as spending money for desires versus needs, or that they worked for something to do before getting married and being supported by men. The reality was that wages for most workers went to supporting families, whether in the U.S. or with funds sent to families in their country of origin. In Dutcher’s account, she asked about women factory workers: “…why is she becoming more and more in some parts of our community…the dependable family bread winner?” In answer to her question, Dutcher claimed the reason is that women “will submit to worse conditions, longer hours, and shorter wages than men.” She then asks, rhetorically, whether it is the employer who forces these conditions, knowing that women are part of “a group without political rights, who may be oppressed with impunity, and forced to underbid her own men-folks?”</div>
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In The Triangle Fire, we learn not only about a tragedy, but also about the courageous women who, even without voting rights at the time, sought to improve working conditions. We see that throughout history women have worked to support their families financially. We learn about women’s contribution to the labor movement, and see the pivotal role women have played in yet another part of history.</div>
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<strong style="border: 0px; font-family: inherit; font-style: inherit; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;"><span style="border: 0px; font-family: inherit; font-size: 12px; font-style: inherit; font-weight: inherit; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; text-transform: uppercase; vertical-align: baseline;">TITLE IX</span></strong><br />
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Title IX seems almost synonymous with women’s athletics programs. However, this “sleeper” piece of legislation was enacted originally with the intent to benefit women in education, not just sports affiliated with high schools and colleges. Patsy Mink, a representative from Hawaii who had been denied medical school admission on account of her gender, saw the measure as finally bringing the Civil Rights Act to its logical conclusion to include educational institutions and to expand protections to include gender as another aspect against which entities could not discriminate. The law has been fraught from the start and has met with resistance especially from American football programs. Each step of the way, those against Title IX have claimed its enforcement pushes men from programs as it helps women secure funding and/or places at the table, in the lecture hall or on playing fields.</div>
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With funding issues across every area of our society today, enforcement of Title IX continues to pit women against men, rather than deal with the issue of funding itself. Continually, American football programs claim they bring in the most revenue, and thus should be exempt from Title IX. Countless research into the actual cost versus the revenue brought in by such programs has shown these claims to be false. Instead, colleges cut minor men’s athletic programs in order to establish or fund programs for women. Thus, they contribute to the misguided idea that Title IX gives to women what it requires be taken from men. This is just business as usual to feminists who are used to this kind of rhetoric from male-dominated sports programs, such as football. The courts continue to support this “reverse” discrimination by not hearing or deciding against men’s programs that sue for equal funding. Time and again, court cases have claimed women’s programs can sue and that Title IX is for the protection of women, rather than to assure equality for both men and women.</div>
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There have been many books written about the differences Title IX has made for women. Princeton’s first female athletic director, Merrily Dean, described these changes stating that she “was called a tomboy” and that her “daughters are called athletes.” Her description is succinct and poignant. It shows how far we’ve come in just a few short decades with a piece of legislation that extended civil rights protections enacted just a decade earlier. The improvements of Title IX extend to the classroom and professors’ offices, not just the locker room. Women have found a place in the halls of academia as students and also as professors as a result of the legislation. Women were categorically denied desks in classrooms and were never considered for tenure or for department chair positions. With Title IX, they were able to demonstrate evidence of discrimination, and won hard-earned positions both as students and as teachers. Today, women often out-number men in colleges and universities, including graduate and professional programs. Title IX contributed to this state of affairs.</div>
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In both of these books, we are reminded it is not that women have been “kept home” or otherwise been relegated to the sidelines, per se. We must realize that scholarship has largely excluded the contributions of women. Not only have we ignored the stories of women, the stories we have ignored in history departments and publishing houses have been largely stories that stem from conditions of poverty, or other minority status, as well. As we move forward, and find more women in academia producing histories such as these two books in the Bedford Series, I hope we will see more of an inclusive, holistic history. We must go back to our universities and textbook publishers and demand the full story, the full <span style="border: 0px; font-family: inherit; font-size: 12px; font-style: inherit; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; text-transform: uppercase; vertical-align: baseline;">HIS</span> and <span style="border: 0px; font-family: inherit; font-size: 12px; font-style: inherit; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; text-transform: uppercase; vertical-align: baseline;">HER</span> story, from all socio-economic tiers and all experiences.</div>
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Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4000130281935557504.post-14807240949015716172012-09-20T20:59:00.000-04:002013-06-27T08:16:27.357-04:00Girls Like Us and Coming of Age in Mississippi Book Reviews<br />
<header class="entry-header" style="color: #333333; font-family: Quicksand, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 16px; line-height: 24px;"><span class="post-date" style="border: 0px; display: block; font-family: inherit; font-style: inherit; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;"><time class="entry-date" datetime="2012-09-20T00:00:03+00:00" pubdate="" style="-webkit-transition: all 0.4s ease-in-out; border: 0px; color: #333333; font-family: inherit; font-style: inherit; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; text-decoration: none; transition: all 0.4s ease-in-out; vertical-align: baseline;">First published <a href="http://www.hercircleezine.com/2012/09/20/u-s-womens-history-part-2-coming-of-age-in-mississippi-and-girls-like-us/" rel="bookmark" style="-webkit-transition: all 0.4s ease-in-out; border: 0px; color: #333333; font-family: inherit; font-style: inherit; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; text-decoration: none; transition: all 0.4s ease-in-out; vertical-align: baseline;" title="12:00 am">September 20, 2012</a></time><span class="byline" style="border: 0px; display: inline; font-family: inherit; font-style: inherit; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;"> at </span><a href="http://www.hercircleezine.com/2012/09/20/u-s-womens-history-part-2-coming-of-age-in-mississippi-and-girls-like-us/">http://www.hercircleezine.com/2012/09/20/u-s-womens-history-part-2-coming-of-age-in-mississippi-and-girls-like-us/</a></span></header><br />
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Last week, I began this four-part series exploring the books my daughter will read in her U.S. Womens History course at the University of Maine, Farmington. Today, inContext focuses on two texts:<span style="border: 0px; font-family: inherit; font-size: 12px; font-style: inherit; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; text-transform: uppercase; vertical-align: baseline;"> COMING OF AGE IN MISSISSIPPI</span> by Anne Moody and <span style="border: 0px; font-family: inherit; font-size: 12px; font-style: inherit; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; text-transform: uppercase; vertical-align: baseline;">GIRLS LIKE US</span> by Sheila Weller. I’ll deal with the latter first.</div>
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<a href="http://www.hercircleezine.com/?attachment_id=21887" rel="attachment wp-att-21887" style="-webkit-transition: all 0.4s ease-in-out; border: 0px; color: #333333; font-family: inherit; font-style: inherit; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; text-decoration: none; transition: all 0.4s ease-in-out; vertical-align: baseline;"><img alt="" class="alignleft size-medium wp-image-21887" height="300" src="http://www.hercircleezine.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/09/120920_girls-like-us-book-cover-225x300.jpg" style="border: 0px; display: inline; float: left; height: auto; margin-bottom: 1.5em; margin-right: 1.5em; margin-top: 1.5em; max-width: 100%;" title="image description" width="225" /></a><span style="border: 0px; font-family: inherit; font-size: 12px; font-style: inherit; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; text-transform: uppercase; vertical-align: baseline;">IN GIRLS LIKE US: CAROLE KING, JONI MITCHELL, CARLY SIMON—AND THE JOURNEY OF A GENERATION</span>, the author, Sheila Weller, promises to show us how each of these performing artists and song writers broke barriers for women and represent the coming-of-age of women in the 1960s. Frankly, the writing did not captivate me, seemed sporadic and disconnected and I felt as though Weller never got to the point. It was frustrating to read about songs and not have them quoted when the lyrics were tantamount to what was being discussed. Either the author assumed every reader would already know each woman’s catalog by heart, or she didn’t get permission to use the songs themselves. If the latter is the case, Weller might have mentioned this to ease the frustration of the reader. Additionally, there’s not much in the way of information directly from King, Mitchell or Simon.</div>
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All of the above said, I am familiar with some of the songs of each woman discussed in<span style="border: 0px; font-family: inherit; font-size: 12px; font-style: inherit; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; text-transform: uppercase; vertical-align: baseline;">GIRLS LIKE US</span>, and I see how each made her own contribution to paving the way for women in music, especially for the time in history in which each woman came of age and found her greatest success. I appreciate that Carole King had her children in tow as she went about writing lasting songs that spoke from and to her generation as well as those subsequent to her time. Joni Mitchell’s child born and given for adoption is surely a sign of the times. Finally, Carly Simon’s spurring of convention as an autonomous sexual person and also caretaking of her addicted husband, James Taylor, speak volumes. Unfortunately, I did not glean from Weller her ideas about the significance of each woman about whom she wrote. I did not get a sense of what Weller felt were their contributions. And, if the music industry today is any indication of the path paved by King, Mitchell and Simon, we see it is one strewn with carcasses lined by bushes more full of thorns than roses. (Of course I don’t fault any of the artists in the book with the condition of the music world for women. It’s just interesting to consider Weller’s view of them and their influence.)</div>
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<a href="http://www.hercircleezine.com/?attachment_id=21888" rel="attachment wp-att-21888" style="-webkit-transition: all 0.4s ease-in-out; border: 0px; color: #333333; font-family: inherit; font-style: inherit; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; text-decoration: none; transition: all 0.4s ease-in-out; vertical-align: baseline;"><img alt="" class="alignleft size-full wp-image-21888" height="300" src="http://www.hercircleezine.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/09/120920_coming_of_age_in_miss.jpg" style="border: 0px; display: inline; float: left; height: auto; margin-bottom: 1.5em; margin-right: 1.5em; margin-top: 1.5em; max-width: 100%;" title="120920_coming_of_age_in_miss" width="300" /></a><span style="border: 0px; font-family: inherit; font-size: 12px; font-style: inherit; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; text-transform: uppercase; vertical-align: baseline;">COMING OF AGE IN MISSISSIPPI</span> by Anne Moody depicts a wholly different experience and journey of a woman who lived in the 1960s. Rather than worry about whether someone would still love her tomorrow (paraphrasing the Carole King lyric), Anne Moody had to worry about whether she’d eat or even be alive to feel hunger the next morning. We see a black woman who shares her lived experience of the violence that took place over civil rights issues in the south. Moody’s history makes something like the treatment of blacks in a book like <span style="border: 0px; font-family: inherit; font-size: 12px; font-style: inherit; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; text-transform: uppercase; vertical-align: baseline;">THE HELP</span> seem not only mild, but also downright optimistic.</div>
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Some online reviewers doubt Moody’s story, such as her being left to care for an infant sibling before she herself was even school age, or her walking to school alone at age five. These detractors have obviously never read slave narratives. Children as young as five were put in charge of their white owners’ babies, and children as young as five were also ironing and cooking. It seems absurd to our notions today of what a five-year-old should have access to—a hot stove or iron—yet we’d be amazed not only at slave narratives, but also the life of any child before mandated education in our country, for example.</div>
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Moody writes about her mother working right through her pregnancies and immediately after delivering babies. When people comment on a CEO today taking just three weeks off for maternity leave, they are often judgmental because one would think a woman of means would have the option of taking more time. Poverty has always forced women to work, regardless of their health or that of their children. When white writers today complain about the dearth of eligible men for marriage, consider the plight of black men throughout history up to and including today and the availability of men to be breadwinners, husbands and fathers in the 1960s. That there existed a great divide between the north and south from the late 1850s through to today’s political divisions is a point driven home by the experiences of blacks living in Chicago versus any town or city in Mississippi.</div>
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While I’ve had occasion to be concerned for my bodily safety due to an attempted kidnapping in my early teens, I have never felt the same concern for my well-being as many blacks faced during the civil rights movement, or still face today in some areas of the U.S. It is humbling to consider that people feared being shot just for registering to vote, for example, or for even being seen with activists attempting to help them register to vote. Even within the violence suffered by those who initiated the suffrage movement, I do not believe that anyone has felt or feels the same mortal fear as that of blacks in Mississippi or Alabama, as examples, during the civil rights era. For an unforgettable rendering of such an eventful time, <span style="border: 0px; font-family: inherit; font-size: 12px; font-style: inherit; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; text-transform: uppercase; vertical-align: baseline;">COMING OF AGE IN MISSISSIPPI</span> provides a first-person account that will leave you thinking long and hard about racism and the effects of poverty.</div>
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Next week, in Part 3 of U.S. Women’s History, we’ll look at <span style="border: 0px; font-family: inherit; font-size: 12px; font-style: inherit; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; text-transform: uppercase; vertical-align: baseline;">THE TRIANGLE FIRE</span> and <span style="border: 0px; font-family: inherit; font-size: 12px; font-style: inherit; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; text-transform: uppercase; vertical-align: baseline;">TITLE IX</span>.</div>
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Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4000130281935557504.post-56284043053895259722012-09-15T21:02:00.000-04:002013-06-27T08:16:15.165-04:00Department of Defense: It's O.K. to be Gay (or Lesbian) But Put Those Breasts Away<br />
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<time class="entry-date" datetime="2012-09-15T00:00:35+00:00" pubdate="" style="-webkit-transition: all 0.4s ease-in-out; border: 0px; color: #333333; font-family: inherit; font-size: 16px; font-style: inherit; line-height: 24px; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; transition: all 0.4s ease-in-out; vertical-align: baseline;">First published <a href="http://www.hercircleezine.com/2012/09/15/department-of-defense-its-o-k-to-be-gay-or-lesbian-but-put-those-breasts-away/" rel="bookmark" style="-webkit-transition: all 0.4s ease-in-out; border: 0px; color: #333333; font-family: inherit; font-style: inherit; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; text-decoration: none; transition: all 0.4s ease-in-out; vertical-align: baseline;" title="12:00 am">September 15, 2012</a></time><span class="byline" style="border: 0px; color: #333333; display: inline; font-family: inherit; font-size: 16px; font-style: inherit; line-height: 24px; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;"> at </span><a href="http://www.hercircleezine.com/2012/09/15/department-of-defense-its-o-k-to-be-gay-or-lesbian-but-put-those-breasts-away/" style="font-family: inherit; font-size: 16px; font-style: inherit; line-height: 24px;">http://www.hercircleezine.com/2012/09/15/department-of-defense-its-o-k-to-be-gay-or-lesbian-but-put-those-breasts-away/</a></h1>
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<a href="http://moms.today.com/_news/2012/05/30/11955844-military-mom-proud-of-breast-feeding-in-uniform-despite-criticism" style="-webkit-transition: all 0.4s ease-in-out; border: 0px; color: #333333; font-family: inherit; font-style: inherit; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; text-decoration: none; transition: all 0.4s ease-in-out; vertical-align: baseline;"><img alt="" class="size-full wp-image-21786" height="222" src="http://www.hercircleezine.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/09/moms.jpg" style="border: 0px; display: block; height: auto; margin: 0px auto; max-width: 100%;" title="moms" width="400" /></a><br />
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WHILE WEARING THEIR UNIFORMS, AIR FORCE SERVICEWOMEN, TERRAN ECHEGOYEN-MCCABE AND CHRISTINA LUNA, BREASTFEED THEIR CHILDREN. PHOTO BY BRYNJA SIGURDARDOTTIR. <a href="http://moms.today.com/_news/2012/05/30/11955844-military-mom-proud-of-breast-feeding-in-uniform-despite-criticism" style="-webkit-transition: all 0.4s ease-in-out; border: 0px; color: #333333; font-family: inherit; font-size: 12px; font-style: inherit; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; text-decoration: none; transition: all 0.4s ease-in-out; vertical-align: baseline;">MSNBC</a></div>
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It will likely come as no surprise to most feminists that the Defense Department remains sexist, specifically against women (mothers), even as it embraces gay and lesbian enlisted and officer personnel. Don’t get me wrong, I’m thrilled that the Department of Defense “gave in” and allowed members of the military to wear their uniforms in the Gay Pride Parade in San Diego July 21, 2012. It’s a sign that the military is recognizing the humanity of its members. I celebrate with all people who work for equality of all peoples, of all races, religions, ethnicities, and sexual orientation. Gender, well, that is one on which the Department of Defense still needs to work. One may be gay or lesbian and serve, yet nursing mothers are asked to stay in the closet, or bathroom.</div>
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Just a few months ago this spring, female Air Force members were chastised for allowing themselves to be photographed while breastfeeding their babies in a public relations campaign aimed at supporting breastfeeding among active duty moms. While the mothers in question are reported to have not suffered sanctions or punishment, that has been publicized, at least, there was uproar from within and outside the military. On websites and radio talk shows, men and women bristled at the thought of women in uniform nursing babies in public. The National Guard made a public statement claiming that regulations do not allow our military members to use their uniforms to promote any kind of cause.</div>
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PHOTO: OLIVIER HODAC</div>
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State legislatures have passed protective legislation around breastfeeding. These laws are aimed at protecting a woman’s right to breastfeed in public, and to view any disapproval by any party as discrimination and harassment. It seems bizarre that legislation had to be enacted so that women were not asked to leave malls, museums and other public places. Especially considering that women’s breasts are used in every manner possible to promote everything from cars to alcoholic beverages, women doing what is natural and healthy for their children being seen as vulgar seems incongruent. This is a testament to the sexism that exists in our society, and the attitude that women’s bodies are not their own, but rather for men. Breasts, when used for their natural and biologically intended purpose, are viewed as somehow undesirable, which, I suppose, is the point. Breasts that are feeding babies are viewed as unavailable sexually, and thus not for the public eye.</div>
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This is taken a step further in the military, which still seems not to know what to do with the presence of women in its midst. The issue is not just the photograph which has made the rounds of the Internet over the past several months. Women in the military who go to well-baby visits while on duty, when they are required to remain in uniform, are told they cannot breastfeed their children in the doctor’s waiting room. Those against women breastfeeding in uniform claim that breastfeeding undermines the authority of the uniform itself and cannot be done in a manner that maintains the decorum expected of active duty military members. Others who won’t condone breastfeeding in uniform claim that the act of breastfeeding feminizes and thus compromises or diminishes the authority conveyed by the uniform. That an act that is considered “feminine” detracts from authority speaks volumes about the pervasive sexism in the military.</div>
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A <a href="http://breastfeedingincombatboots.com/2012/05/forget-breastfeeding-publicwhat-about-uniform/" style="-webkit-transition: all 0.4s ease-in-out; border: 0px; color: #333333; font-family: inherit; font-style: inherit; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; text-decoration: none; transition: all 0.4s ease-in-out; vertical-align: baseline;">blog</a> that deals with breastfeeding issues for women in the military brings up an interesting argument in this debate. First, there is no policy about women breastfeeding in uniform, and thus, individual commanders invoking their own policy based on their personal feelings is not adequate. Additionally, the argument is made that if a woman cannot breastfeed in public in uniform, then she should also be prohibited from bottle feeding. When viewed from that standpoint, it is interesting that we consider nurturing and feeding babies as an act that denigrates the uniform. What does that say about our military and our culture at large? Taken a step further (into absurdity, I admit), I suppose fathers returning from war zones should not embrace children or be pictured rolling in the grass with long-missed dogs upon homecomings. The act of embracing and lifting a child out of doors might disturb the cap worn by military members as required by uniform standards. Additionally, how can one take seriously a man who drops to his knees to tearily embrace his toddler? Isn’t his authority diminished? We see his human side, his nurturing side, and how can we then later take orders from him?</div>
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With the repeal of “Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell,” we have actually proven that even if someone is not heterosexual, he or she is still to be taken seriously and remains authoritative. We have seen military members embrace, both metaphorically and sometimes even physically, their comrades in arms who are gay or lesbian. The structure of the military and its authority have not been undermined by something less than our constructed definitions of masculinity. It is femininity that remains unable to be embraced.</div>
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This summer, public sentiment about the repeal of “Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell” and the climate for acceptance of gay and lesbian members of the military were enough to topple the Defense Department. (Don’t tell the Taliban!) Typically, members of the military are prohibited from marching in parades in full uniform, according to the Department of Defense. In this case, when the parade is in support of sexual orientation, it would seem doubly egregious for uniformed military personnel to march, since not only does it go against policies about parades, but also supports a cause.</div>
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PHOTO: IAN S.</div>
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While San Diego is known as a military community with the Marines and Navy both based out of the area, it is also known as a city that embraces all lifestyles. (San Diego is even known as a “dog city” for those who want to live in a place that accepts pets as readily as people.) I think it is absolutely wonderful—a cause for celebration—that our men and women of the armed forces were allowed to wear their uniforms and march in the Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual and Transgender Pride Parade, and a huge step forward for our country and society, in fact. What bothers me is that if any of our enlisted or officer moms marched or sat on the sidelines in uniform, that they would have been ridiculed and possibly disciplined for nursing their babies. It seems a total miscarriage of justice that mothers who serve our country are treated still as second-class citizens, and are asked to remain behind closed doors, in metaphorical closets, even as I celebrate the acceptance and equality of gay and lesbian soldiers.</div>
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Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4000130281935557504.post-2282613400053341972012-09-13T21:03:00.000-04:002013-06-27T08:16:03.014-04:00Women's America: Refocusing the Past Book Review<br />
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<time class="entry-date" datetime="2012-09-13T00:00:37+00:00" pubdate="" style="-webkit-transition: all 0.4s ease-in-out; border: 0px; color: #333333; font-family: inherit; font-size: 16px; font-style: inherit; line-height: 24px; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; text-decoration: none; transition: all 0.4s ease-in-out; vertical-align: baseline;">First published <a href="http://www.hercircleezine.com/2012/09/13/september-6-2012/" rel="bookmark" style="-webkit-transition: all 0.4s ease-in-out; border: 0px; color: #333333; font-family: inherit; font-size: 16px; font-style: inherit; line-height: 24px; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; text-decoration: none; transition: all 0.4s ease-in-out; vertical-align: baseline;" title="12:00 am">September 13, 2012</a></time><span class="byline" style="border: 0px; color: #333333; display: inline; font-family: inherit; font-size: 16px; font-style: inherit; line-height: 24px; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;"> at </span><a href="http://www.hercircleezine.com/2012/09/13/september-6-2012/" style="font-family: Quicksand, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 16px; line-height: 24px;">http://www.hercircleezine.com/2012/09/13/september-6-2012/</a></h1>
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Last weekend, my husband and I dropped our daughter off at the University of Maine, Farmington for her first semester of college. Of course, such a transition is fraught with conflicting emotions. Part of me as a mother fears every possible and unlikely fate that might befall a young woman in her first year of college. Another part of me is happy to have her out of the house, and many parents of teenagers might understand that part all too well themselves. What I’m excited about is that my daughter, who wrote her college essay about how she does not identify as a feminist, but rather a humanist (which she equates with egalitarian thought), will take HTY 246S U.S. Women’s History this fall. The course description states that the class will cover the political, social, economic and cultural aspects of history related to women. It will explore movements for women’s rights, women and work, differences between women of varied class, race and ethnicity along with women’s roles within family and community and the evolving nature of gender. It is my great hope that my daughter embraces feminism and comes to see it as the impetus for her egalitarian humanism.</div>
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My reason for sharing this information is to explore the six books required for my daughter’s course as subjects for inContext for a four-part series. The books we’ll look at include the following: <span style="border: 0px; font-family: inherit; font-size: 12px; font-style: inherit; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; text-transform: uppercase; vertical-align: baseline;">COMING OF AGE IN MISSISSIPPI</span> by Anne Moody, <span style="border: 0px; font-family: inherit; font-size: 12px; font-style: inherit; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; text-transform: uppercase; vertical-align: baseline;">GIRLS LIKE US: CAROLE KING, JONI MITCHELL, CARLY SIMON—AND THE JOURNEY OF A GENERATION</span> by Sheila Weller, <span style="border: 0px; font-family: inherit; font-size: 12px; font-style: inherit; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; text-transform: uppercase; vertical-align: baseline;">ODD GIRL OUT</span> by Ann Bannon, <span style="border: 0px; font-family: inherit; font-size: 12px; font-style: inherit; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; text-transform: uppercase; vertical-align: baseline;">WOMEN’S AMERICA: REFOCUSING THE PAST</span> by Linda K. Kerber, Jane Sherron De Hart and Cornelia Hughes Dayton, and two Bedford Series in History and Culture books, <span style="border: 0px; font-family: inherit; font-size: 12px; font-style: inherit; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; text-transform: uppercase; vertical-align: baseline;">THE TRIANGLE FIRE</span> by Jo Ann E. Argersinger and <span style="border: 0px; font-family: inherit; font-size: 12px; font-style: inherit; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; text-transform: uppercase; vertical-align: baseline;">TITLE IX</span> by Susan Ware.</div>
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<a href="http://www.hercircleezine.com/?attachment_id=21337" rel="attachment wp-att-21337" style="-webkit-transition: all 0.4s ease-in-out; border: 0px; color: #333333; font-family: inherit; font-style: inherit; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; text-decoration: none; transition: all 0.4s ease-in-out; vertical-align: baseline;"><img alt="" class="alignright size-full wp-image-21337" height="154" src="http://www.hercircleezine.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/08/0195388321.gif" style="border: 0px; display: inline; float: right; height: auto; margin-bottom: 1.5em; margin-left: 1.5em; margin-top: 1.5em; max-width: 100%;" width="154" /></a>The most comprehensive book, <span style="border: 0px; font-family: inherit; font-size: 12px; font-style: inherit; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; text-transform: uppercase; vertical-align: baseline;">WOMEN’S AMERICA: REFOCUSING THE PAST</span> includes excerpts from women’s history articles and texts along with documents that support each. Each period of United States history, from early settlements in the 1600s through industrialization and the frontier, to modern times is covered in this way. One excerpt fascinated me due to my recently acquired knowledge that Thomas Jefferson’s wife and his slave and lover Sally Hemmings shared the same father. The excerpt is from <span style="border: 0px; font-family: inherit; font-size: 12px; font-style: inherit; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; text-transform: uppercase; vertical-align: baseline;"><a href="http://books.wwnorton.com/books/978-0-393-06477-3/" style="-webkit-transition: all 0.4s ease-in-out; border: 0px; color: #333333; font-family: inherit; font-style: inherit; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; text-decoration: none; transition: all 0.4s ease-in-out; vertical-align: baseline;">THE HEMMINGSES OF MONTICELLO: AN AMERICAN FAMILY</a></span> by Annette Gordon-Reed. I have known for some time that Sally Hemmings, a slave in the Jefferson household, and Thomas Jefferson had a relationship. What I was not aware of was that Ms. Hemmings and Martha (Wayles) Jefferson shared the same father.</div>
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In reading the excerpt from Gordon-Reed’s book, I also learned about a relationship between Sally’s older sister, Mary Hemmings, and a merchant Thomas Bell. At one point, Jefferson hired Mary out to Bell on lease. When Jefferson returned from Paris, Mary Hemmings requested that she be sold to Bell, as she wished to live with him and their children. Jefferson complied with the request. It seems evident that in both the relationship between Thomas Bell and Mary and Thomas Jefferson and Sally, affection was mutual, and the relationship was not merely the keeping of a concubine by a slave owner. Of course, Gordon-Reed points out that we cannot know what the thoughts of any of these persons were since no record exists of their private thoughts.</div>
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Lest you think all of the articles are serious and scholarly, there’s an essay by Patricia Mainardi (taken from an anthology, <a href="http://www.robinmorgan.us/robin_morgan_bookDetails.asp?ProductID=9" style="-webkit-transition: all 0.4s ease-in-out; border: 0px; color: #333333; font-family: inherit; font-style: inherit; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; text-decoration: none; transition: all 0.4s ease-in-out; vertical-align: baseline;"><span style="border: 0px; font-family: inherit; font-size: 12px; font-style: inherit; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; text-transform: uppercase; vertical-align: baseline;">SISTERHOOD IS POWERFUL: AN ANTHOLOGY OF WRITINGS FROM THE WOMEN’S LIBERATION MOVEMENT</span></a>, edited by Robin Morgan) about housework that is fabulous. It made me laugh and cringe at the same time. Even in my egalitarian marriage, there are a few little things about the division of labor that irk my husband and me. For example, because he doesn’t wish to perform some tasks, like letter writing, that is my job. And, while I’m capable of taking care of insects that find their way into our house now and again, I don’t hesitate, on principle, to make him get out of bed to handle a spider before I get in the shower.</div>
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Next week, we’ll look at the experience of another generation of women of color through Anne Moody’s <span style="border: 0px; font-family: inherit; font-size: 12px; font-style: inherit; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; text-transform: uppercase; vertical-align: baseline;">COMING OF AGE IN MISSISSIPPI</span>. We’ll also see how women fared in the 1970s in the world of music through <span style="border: 0px; font-family: inherit; font-size: 12px; font-style: inherit; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; text-transform: uppercase; vertical-align: baseline;">GIRLS LIKE US</span> by Sheila Weller.</div>
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Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4000130281935557504.post-738712329559772612012-09-06T21:05:00.000-04:002013-06-27T08:15:50.535-04:00No More Mr. Nice Guy<br />
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<time class="entry-date" datetime="2012-09-06T00:00:22+00:00" pubdate="" style="-webkit-transition: all 0.4s ease-in-out; border: 0px; color: #333333; font-family: inherit; font-size: 16px; font-style: inherit; line-height: 24px; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; transition: all 0.4s ease-in-out; vertical-align: baseline;">First published <a href="http://www.hercircleezine.com/2012/09/06/no-more-mr-nice-guy/" rel="bookmark" style="-webkit-transition: all 0.4s ease-in-out; border: 0px; color: #333333; font-family: inherit; font-style: inherit; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; text-decoration: none; transition: all 0.4s ease-in-out; vertical-align: baseline;" title="12:00 am">September 6, 2012</a></time><span class="byline" style="border: 0px; color: #333333; display: inline; font-family: inherit; font-size: 16px; font-style: inherit; line-height: 24px; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;"> at </span><a href="http://www.hercircleezine.com/2012/09/06/no-more-mr-nice-guy/" style="font-family: inherit; font-size: 16px; font-style: inherit; line-height: 24px;">http://www.hercircleezine.com/2012/09/06/no-more-mr-nice-guy/</a></h1>
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PHOTO CREDIT: LEWISHA JONES</div>
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I’ve been thinking about the recent sentencing of Tony Farmer, and his ex-girlfriend’s reaction. Mr. Farmer was a basketball hero at his high school, with serious recruitment potential and a shot at the dream life so many young people in sports stoke as motivation for practicing, excelling in school along with their sport and taking on all manner of challenges to reach their goals. When Mr. Farmer was sentenced, Andrea Lane, his ex-girlfriend and the victim of the crimes for which he was sentenced, broke down in court. She is quoted as telling a newspaper in Cleveland that she thinks Mr. Farmer was a good person, and that she hoped he still was. Rather than write about violence against women, privilege in sports or anything else like that, I write herein an open letter to Andrea Lane. However, the letter is also to any person who is the victim of assault by an intimate partner especially. Often, if the perpetrator (male or female) is an otherwise upstanding citizen, the victim is blamed for “taking down” the perpetrator, in a cruel twist of fate that delegitimizes victims and helps perpetuate partner violence. This kind of thought could be applied to the controversy over Joe Paterno, (or anyone else connected to the horrific, long-term abuse that took place at Penn State) and anyplace or time when victims are blamed for disparaging someone who is otherwise highly lauded and respected in other realms of life.</div>
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Here is my open letter to Andrea Lane, the victim of assault, kidnapping and robbery perpetrated by Tony Farmer, a young man with sports potential.</div>
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Dear Andrea:</div>
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When a man assaults you, kidnaps you, drags you by the hair, steals from you and then threatens to cause you more harm if you testify against him for the crimes he’s committed, he is no longer a good person as you told the <span style="border: 0px; font-family: inherit; font-size: 12px; font-style: inherit; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; text-transform: uppercase; vertical-align: baseline;">CLEVELAND PLAIN DEALER</span>. A good person does not hit or otherwise harm his girlfriend. He does not steal from her and he does not threaten her. Sure, your former boyfriend may have a lot of people on his side. As we have seen in our society, from the likes of O.J. Simpson to Michael Vick, men who have money and social standing from careers in sports are often forgiven for heinous acts and even crimes. (And, no, I am NOT going there about Mr. Simpson’s guilt or innocence with the murder charges. The truth is that Mr. Simpson was not a “good person” merely due to his assault of the former Mrs. Simpson, which is on tape and undeniable.)</div>
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Yes, “good people” can do bad things, and feel remorse and even attempt retribution or other repair to the lives they have damaged with their actions. And, as much as the world loves a “come back kid” story, I always think of the kids who do not behave in such a way, and ask why they are never lauded. The best people don’t “mess up” in such major (or violent) ways.</div>
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Ms. Lane, you did not end the potential success or basketball career of Tony Farmer. He did that himself when he assaulted, kidnapped, stole from and intimidated you. He was shocked at his sentencing because he was shocked to be sentenced at all. He figured that with everyone else rooting for him, he’d be free to return to his golden life while you dealt with being his unfortunate ex-girlfriend. Who would sentence a young man with such potential? I mean, basketball is more important than some silly girl, right? Wrong, and the judge in this case determined that justice be served rather than hoops.</div>
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In fact, you might consider that Tony’s actions were even more inexcusable given his opportunities in life. If he was truly concerned with his basketball potential, his focus might have been there versus arguing with you. Even in an argument, he might have considered all he might lose if he behaved in a way that was not only cruel, but also illegal. If Mr. Farmer was such a good person, he may not have collapsed in court, either, but rather held his resolve, realizing that he alone was responsible for his actions, and therefore responsible for answering to those actions. Rather, he saw his name in the lights disappear. He saw the name on the back of the jersey disappear, like too much bleach added to the wash. He did not see your cowering, fearful self, or himself as the cause of your terror.</div>
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While Mr. Farmer may not have serial killer potential, there are women who interacted with the infamous Ted Bundy, and found him to be a wonderful man. Anne Rule (the author of <span style="border: 0px; font-family: inherit; font-size: 12px; font-style: inherit; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; text-transform: uppercase; vertical-align: baseline;">THE STRANGER BESIDE ME</span>) worked with Mr. Bundy at a suicide hotline. In him, at the time, she saw a volunteer who helped people—one side of a man who brutally murdered women. Elizabeth Kendall (author of <span style="border: 0px; font-family: inherit; font-size: 12px; font-style: inherit; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; text-transform: uppercase; vertical-align: baseline;">THE PHANTOM PRINCE</span>) was Mr. Bundy’s girlfriend. He acted as a father to her child from a previous relationship. While both of these women offered information to police that finally helped them catch Mr. Bundy, for the longest time, neither wanted to believe that their “prince” or that the nice guy who volunteered with them, was the mysterious, elusive killer he turned out to be. I don’t think that Tony Farmer is a potential serial killer. However, without just punishment for the crimes he committed, he might have turned out to be at least a serial abuser of women. Just because someone does good things, does not necessarily make him a good person if he also does awful things.</div>
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I wrote a while back about my own connection to domestic violence. I do not condemn Tony Farmer as a life-long abuser. There is potential that he might just be a “good person” again, one who does not perpetuate violence in his future relationships. Hopefully, his jail time will include correctional aspects so that he realizes the error of violence as a reaction to conflict.</div>
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Andrea, Tony may have been a great basketball player. He might have had a future of which so many young people dream. It was not you who toppled the tall basketball player. He alone is responsible for cutting short his own potential. Remember that.</div>
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Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4000130281935557504.post-58698579461881277332012-08-30T21:07:00.000-04:002013-06-27T08:15:38.474-04:00Republican Candidates and Rape: Still Blaming the Woman<br />
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<time class="entry-date" datetime="2012-08-30T00:00:54+00:00" pubdate="" style="-webkit-transition: all 0.4s ease-in-out; border: 0px; color: #333333; font-family: inherit; font-size: 16px; font-style: inherit; line-height: 24px; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; transition: all 0.4s ease-in-out; vertical-align: baseline;">First published <a href="http://www.hercircleezine.com/2012/08/30/republican-candidates-and-rape-still-blaming-the-woman/" rel="bookmark" style="-webkit-transition: all 0.4s ease-in-out; border: 0px; color: #333333; font-family: inherit; font-style: inherit; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; text-decoration: none; transition: all 0.4s ease-in-out; vertical-align: baseline;" title="12:00 am">August 30, 2012</a></time><span class="byline" style="border: 0px; color: #333333; display: inline; font-family: inherit; font-size: 16px; font-style: inherit; line-height: 24px; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;"> at </span><a href="http://www.hercircleezine.com/2012/08/30/republican-candidates-and-rape-still-blaming-the-woman/" style="font-family: inherit; font-size: 16px; font-style: inherit; line-height: 24px;">http://www.hercircleezine.com/2012/08/30/republican-candidates-and-rape-still-blaming-the-woman/</a></h1>
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Like the Famous Quote of the Supreme Court Justice who said that he may not be able to define pornography, yet knew when he saw it, representatives in state and federal legislatures may refuse to say, “vagina” or “uterus,” yet they want to regulate it. Earlier this year, female members of <a href="http://thinkprogress.org/health/2012/06/14/499961/as-punishment-for-opposing-anti-abortion-bill-male-michigan-house-leader-bans-two-female-reps-from-speaking/?mobile=nc" style="-webkit-transition: all 0.4s ease-in-out; border: 0px; color: #333333; font-family: inherit; font-style: inherit; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; text-decoration: none; transition: all 0.4s ease-in-out; vertical-align: baseline;" target="_blank">Michigan’s legislature were sanctioned and silenced</a> for using anatomical terms to describe their female reproductive and sexual organs, and for speaking about permanent male birth control. Apparently, male representatives to Michigan’s House and Senate find the female anatomy so repulsive that mere mention of the actual medical terms was viewed as damaging to the decorum preferred by these men, which, I assume, makes it o.k. to regulate what can and can’t happen to the female body, as long as the body parts they are regulating are not mentioned. The problem I have with all of this is that these same members of Congress do not even understand the physiology or function of the female body’s reproductive organs, and yet they want to regulate them.</div>
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With the addition of Paul Ryan to the Romney ticket, talk has come around again to protecting a woman’s right to choose whether to continue a pregnancy. Ryan’s stance has been proven in his support for legislation that has pended before Congress, and that stance is that he would not even allow for abortion in cases of rape. Republican rhetoric (Rep. Todd Akin, specifically) has actually gone as far as to claim that while the rapist should be punished, the child (who is the result of rape) should not. Presumably, a woman seeking an abortion after being raped is punishing the child for the violent behavior of its “father.” Fortunately, I have never been raped. However, I imagine that being raped, finding out that I’m pregnant and having to undergo an abortion would seem equivalent to double indemnity.</div>
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What would Representative Akin have done with the children forcibly born as the result of rape? If we assume the rapist is caught, convicted and sentenced to prison, then who raises the child? Apparently, the woman who is raped should be forced to raise the child. Oh, but isn’t there always that choice of adoption? Yes, I am sure there is a list of people waiting who would be thrilled to adopt the child who is the result of a rape. Even if the adoptive parents were not aware of the circumstances surrounding this child’s conception, what happens twenty years later when the child decides to seek his or her birth mother? (As we all know, more often than not, a father is left off a birth certificate in adoption cases, and thus is protected forever in anonymity.) How does that child feel when he or she calls “mom” and is told that he or she is the product of rape, and that is why he or she was “unwanted” and put up for adoption? Then again, maybe rape victims who are forced to bear the offspring of rape would be allowed to remain off the birth certificate to protect their privacy. Maybe the father only could be listed. He could be the one to do the explaining about the child’s conception. And, I suppose if we forced women to bear the children that resulted from rape, they’d have an easier time proving their case in court to get a conviction of the rapist. The DNA paternity would be a perfect piece of evidence for the prosecution, no?</div>
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Let’s return to the lack of knowledge of and the refusal to speak in medical and anatomical terms on behalf of representatives who want to regulate the same parts about which they cannot speak. Rep. Stephen Freind, who is not a medical doctor, insists that pregnancy from rape is extremely rare because women’s bodies “secrete a secretion” that kills sperm. Really? Women’s bodies possess a chemical that kills sperm? Why can’t we just turn that on at will to use as birth control? Why invent nonoxyl-9? Why not just tap women’s bodies for this sperm-killing “secretion”? If stress and fear could expel a pregnancy, then teen pregnancy would likely be more rare than pregnancy from rape.</div>
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It is terrifying to me that men sit in Congress who know nothing—absolutely nothing—about women’s bodies and are the same people who not only wish to, but also have the ability, through legislation, to control women’s bodies. Not only do they want to stop abortions for any reason, but they also want to redefine rape in the most narrow terms. They believe that by doing so, they can reduce abortions. And, even if pregnancy from rape is rare, it is not non-existent. Regardless of whether a woman is appalled at being pregnant and wants to abort the child that is the result of rape, she must still be the one to undergo the abortion procedure.</div>
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On a closing note, the Representatives I name herein, amongst others, have already been elected to office. They’re proposing these kinds of legislation because they’re in a position to do so. I’ve said it before and will likely say it again this election season: we need to carefully examine the people behind the names on the ballot. We can’t allow advertisements to influence us. We must look at real actions, voting records, and/or other experience that demonstrates the particular candidate’s likelihood to protect our right to control our own bodies.</div>
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Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4000130281935557504.post-3109985786026536812012-08-23T21:08:00.000-04:002013-06-27T08:15:07.496-04:00What Makes an Attractive Candidate?<br />
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<time class="entry-date" datetime="2012-08-23T00:00:53+00:00" pubdate="" style="-webkit-transition: all 0.4s ease-in-out; border: 0px; color: #333333; font-family: inherit; font-size: 16px; font-style: inherit; line-height: 24px; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; transition: all 0.4s ease-in-out; vertical-align: baseline;">First published <a href="http://www.hercircleezine.com/2012/08/23/what-makes-an-attractive-candidate/" rel="bookmark" style="-webkit-transition: all 0.4s ease-in-out; border: 0px; color: #333333; font-family: inherit; font-style: inherit; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; text-decoration: none; transition: all 0.4s ease-in-out; vertical-align: baseline;" title="12:00 am">August 23, 2012</a></time><span class="byline" style="border: 0px; color: #333333; display: inline; font-family: inherit; font-size: 16px; font-style: inherit; line-height: 24px; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;"> at </span><a href="http://www.hercircleezine.com/2012/08/23/what-makes-an-attractive-candidate/" style="font-family: inherit; font-size: 16px; font-style: inherit; line-height: 24px;">http://www.hercircleezine.com/2012/08/23/what-makes-an-attractive-candidate/</a></h1>
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PHOTO: SUNDAY KOFAX</div>
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For a number of reasons, former Vice President Dick Cheney has never been one of my favored people or respected representatives. His latest comment about Sarah Palin rankles me further. I share Cheney’s sentiment that McCain’s choice of Palin as his running mate sealed the election as a loss for McCain, and his qualification of that opinion that Governor Palin was not capable of being president. However, I am appalled at his sexist attempt to backtrack over any offense he might have caused by claiming Palin was not qualified.</div>
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Mr. Cheney said, “I like Governor Palin. I’ve met her. I know her. She’s an attractive candidate.”</div>
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What?</div>
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If we’re talking about a candidate as attractive, whether the candidate is male or female, I believe “attractive” would be defined as being related to the qualities possessed by the candidate that make him or her acceptable and desirable for the position for which he or she is a candidate. Herein, when Mr. Cheney already disqualifies Ms. Palin based on his opinion that she is not capable of meeting the challenge of the job, he is most certainly referring to her appearance.</div>
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We all need to wake up and stop voting based on appearance versus substance and ability. I wish as we consider nominees as candidates for political campaigns, we were presented with resumes as do employers see from job applicants. We see the paper and possibly some back-up proof of a person’s education, experience and accomplishments but no picture of him or her. Once we decide who seems most qualified, we choose one from this pool to nominate. Only then do we “conduct interviews” through their public, in-person campaign. What a relief that would be for accomplished, intelligent, committed people who might have acne scars, use a wheel chair or have a prosthesis of some kind to be able to run for office without their appearance (of ability or inability) to detract from their otherwise obvious qualifications!</div>
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What if the major parties in this country were required to examine resumes and choose potential candidates based on the information presented and the back-up proof of the claimed accomplishments? What if they couldn’t judge the “electability” of a person based on his or her appearance? What if all of us could not? I realize we live in a pictorial and digital age. We feel connection with people by face-to-face conversations, and certainly hiring decisions are not based on “paper alone” but rather a combination of the written listing of a person’s accomplishments and his or her ability to interact one-on-one, and to answer the problems posed in the position that needs to be filled. It’s nice to “connect” with a candidate as he or she speaks and conducts him or her self in public.</div>
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At the same time, the “attractiveness” of a candidate cannot be based on his or her physical appearance in the slightest. Aside from whether women themselves want to take on challenging political roles while parenting, or can remain committed to challenging jobs long-term while having young children, women need to stop being judged and either loved or hated for their external appearances. The job of Vice President or President is not the September cover model for <span style="border: 0px; font-family: inherit; font-size: 12px; font-style: inherit; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; text-transform: uppercase; vertical-align: baseline;">VOGUE</span> or the swimsuit issue of <span style="border: 0px; font-family: inherit; font-size: 12px; font-style: inherit; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; text-transform: uppercase; vertical-align: baseline;">SPORTS ILLUSTRATED</span>. Whether someone would look good in the fashions on the pages of <span style="border: 0px; font-family: inherit; font-size: 12px; font-style: inherit; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; text-transform: uppercase; vertical-align: baseline;">VOGUE</span> or in what is claimed as a swimsuit in the pages of <span style="border: 0px; font-family: inherit; font-size: 12px; font-style: inherit; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; text-transform: uppercase; vertical-align: baseline;">S.I.</span>, does not qualify or disqualify her for government office.</div>
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We all must vote based on whether the candidates are attractive due to their qualities and experience, not on whether they’ve ever been the “bachelor of the month” in<span style="border: 0px; font-family: inherit; font-size: 12px; font-style: inherit; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; text-transform: uppercase; vertical-align: baseline;">COSMOPOLITAN</span>—one of the “qualifications” touted by a campaign in my home state of Massachusetts for state senate. We must challenge ourselves to read about and listen to candidates, male or female, and hear their message before we determine whether they “look” presidential or physically attractive. Cheney’s comment merely proves that the old-boy network still largely controls our political parties. This is something we women must seriously consider as we vote this November.</div>
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Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0